Total pages in book: 129
Estimated words: 129110 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 646(@200wpm)___ 516(@250wpm)___ 430(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 129110 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 646(@200wpm)___ 516(@250wpm)___ 430(@300wpm)
"You still didn't answer," I croak and he looks up.
"Neither did you."
"Good thing."
“I know I don’t feel the same way about acting as I do about music.”
I nod. I can understand falling into something you’re not into, in more ways than one.
“Can I tell you something?”
He's regarding me with a curious expression, and purse my lips, hiding a smile. "What do you call what you've been doing?"
"Cute," he rolls his eyes, pausing. "Let's call it hopefully not getting my arse handed to me since you still won't sign anything."
"Let's hope," I tease, following his stare to where the NDA sits. Mona must have brought it back with her and left it.
"You could ruin me."
I chuckle, but when I look up I see that he's dead serious, his expression stern and serious, unsure and bewildered. "You still don't trust me, do you?"
His cautious gaze burns.
“I’m getting it back, the music,” he looks away, his thoughts clearly muddled. “I’ve been recording again and... I’m almost finished with a new album, but I don’t know if I’ll ever release it.”
Whoa. Maybe he does trust me.
“Oh, wow!” I exclaim, maybe a little too excitedly.
“Yeah,” he chuckles. “It would be cool to put out another album, right?"
"Um, yes!" I compose myself. "Yeah."
"I suppose I’d love to tour again too, but I don’t know if it will get that far. I just feel ready, you know?”
I eagerly nod, no longer caring that I'm coming off way too strong.
“It’s not that easy, though,” he slouches.
“Why not? If you feel it’s right-”
“The right thing is to finish the third Sunbitten movie. I’ve already signed on for it, but... I just... fuck it. I have no desire to do it.”
"Shit."
"Yeah."
"I'm not looking for advice or anything," he apologizes, like I mind hearing this. Then he laughs, like he can't believe he's telling me. "I get a lot of that. Starting to wonder if it's in my best interest or not."
"That's... sad."
"Sure, but do people offer to help because they want something in return? Because of what being near me can do for them? Or are they actually, you know, trying to help?”
I start to say something, but he cuts me off.
“Not that I think that’s what you're doing. Actually, go ahead and tell me what you think."
"Me?"
"Yeah, you. Let's hear it, New York."
"New York?"
"That's where you're from, no?"
"Yeah," I roll my eyes. "Did you forget my name already?"
"Once again, you're completely adorable."
I pocket that for later.
"It’s not really my advice," I bite my lip. "but my mom always says the only person you should listen to is yourself."
He smiles kindy.
"So how'd I do?"
"I think I would love to meet your Mother."
"That would be weird."
"Would it?"
I'm too flabbergasted picturing it to respond.
“I'm sure you know, your Mother's advice, while great, is easier said than done.”
“The most difficult things usually are. But they're also the most worth it."
“Touché,” he settles back, looking me over like he's sizing me up. Not so much in a judging way. More like he's still trying to decide what to make of me. I can't tell what the verdict is.
Guess the jury's still out.
The TV is a light buzz in the background as everything he's said these past few minutes runs through my mind. It's finally all hitting me.
"So how's a girl like you single?"
Okay, so he went there.
I bite my lip, realizing he's not asking in a condescending way. Or in an interested for himself way either. He's definitely not making fun of me. He just... wants to know.
Then it dawns on me that technically I do have a boyfriend, and earlier I did say I was single.
I lied.
To someone like me, who thinks they're always being fed lies by those they're supposed to trust.
Shit.
I panic.
He definitely can tell.
"So about that," I clear my throat.
He hates my words already.
"I guess on paper I technically have a boyfriend but-” I stop talking. My comment startles him.
He's not happy, and all I can focus on are the big red sirens blasting retreat! retreat! in my mind.
His eyes widen and a scowl forms, like he knew better than to trust me.
Mayday, mayday, we're going down.
“I know earlier I said I was single and I’m sorry for that. I was just nervous. You're-” I shut up as his expression becomes even more unreadable.
"Intimidating?" he snaps in a loud huff, and I furrow my eyebrows. He sits back, not seeing me nod, and I wait for him to say something more but he doesn’t.
“I guess the thing is... I wish I was single and don't want to be with him." I blurt out the words so fast I don't even know if he heard them all.
I'm still proud of myself for saying it out loud and admitting it though, even as he nervously looks up.
“Not because of you,” I quickly add, just to be clear.