Total pages in book: 129
Estimated words: 129110 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 646(@200wpm)___ 516(@250wpm)___ 430(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 129110 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 646(@200wpm)___ 516(@250wpm)___ 430(@300wpm)
My mouth is dry.
This is definitely not the story I read about.
Our eyes meet. I’ve never seen him so upset, so raw and real. Crap. I’ve never liked him more than I do right now.
“I was the one the label focused on,” he continues. “They knew I’d sell more - they’d make more if I was on my own. The market was over boy bands,” he clears his throat. “The guys were hurt, understandably... and no executive would look at a group without me in it. Naturally things got ugly, but at the time I was in the dark. When I finally found out what happened I tried to reach out and make things right, but it was too late.”
“So then you toured?” I continue.
“I did what I had to do,” he offers a stern look. “Yes, I toured like everyone wanted. The thing is,” he lets out a small, breathy laugh, “I was good solo. It was nice not having to worry about anyone else. I loved having the creative control. I got cocky. Everyone told me I made the best decision of my career and I got caught up in it. I already lost the respect of my friends, the label was happy, and I was killing it. I didn’t care about anything else. Nothing mattered to me anymore.”
I lean in, enthralled.
“Then they wanted a second album,” he swallows. “So I gave them one. I was a king and nothing could stop me. Another tour followed,” he hesitates. “After that it all went down hill. I’m sure you’ve read things,” he looks up, and I nod. “Some of it was my fault. Some theirs. Eventually I was done. My body couldn’t take anymore. I couldn’t write anymore. I couldn’t make music. I lost everything while having it all.”
He cheers up yet still manages to look disgruntled. It’s a strange expression that only he can master.
“And that’s how I got into acting." His words are plain and boring, like he hates them. “I didn’t even have to try. I was wanted... hence not being sure if I’m good at it or not.”
I don’t realize how far on the edge of my seat I’m sitting until I almost fall. I have a million questions, but where to start?
"So my comment earlier on your choice of rolls must have really upset you."
He shoots me a look. He doesn't appreciate that I brought it up again.
"I'm sorry... so, um you've never made up with anyone from Let’s Go?”
“No,” he spits, “and I stopped trying a long time ago. I don’t deserve their respect and they’re not willing to give it to me anyway. I ruined their lives."
I slowly nod.
“We talked once, but it ended poorly. There were too many reps involved. I was so young then.... but it is what it is and it was what it was.”
“So what is it you want? Now I mean. You obviously still love music,” I glance at his guitar again, and then the notepad. “You still write.” It's a statement rather than a question, and when I glance back at him he's eying the notebook too. I know I'm right.
The air is so thick it needs to be cut with a knife, and luckily suddenly one enters. Mona reappears, and judging by her expression she doesn't like what she sees, which is us, sitting opposite each other yet somehow close. I don't realize how many inches apart our noses are until someone else is in the room. We both back away at the same time yet neither of our gazes leaves the other.
"Asher, did you speak to her any further about the NDA?" her voice is icy, yet bored.
"You can send it to my lawyers to look over," I stand. "Bathroom?"
"Down the hall. Second door on the left?" he answers, unsure. I'm sure I'll find it. As I head out I hear the curiousity in Moan's voice. "Who’s her lawyer?" Followed by Asher’s cackle, knowing I don’t have one.
"It's a joke-" he starts, and then I'm too far away to hear the rest.
When I return she's no longer there.
"So she hates me."
"Mona?" he shrugs. "She hates everyone."
"Great."
“She’s been with me since the very beginning... she also thinks I should stick to acting.”
“Huh."
"What?"
"What do you think?”
"Me?"
"Yeah, don't you get a say?"
"Not very often."
I raise an eyebrow. How can that be?
"Bound by contracts."
"Don't you read them?"
"I mean," he furrows his eyebrows like he truly never thought about it before. "That's what I have people for - my team. Lawyers, agent, publicist, reps... you look like I'm being insane."
"You're not what I thought."
"Is that good or bad?"
I shake my head, unsure. I think I like this part of him the most, his lack of judgement, clueless like me. His openness, like somehow me being here is making him better. His yearning... to be different. It's one of the most human thing about him, in a good way.