Total pages in book: 145
Estimated words: 148397 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 742(@200wpm)___ 594(@250wpm)___ 495(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 148397 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 742(@200wpm)___ 594(@250wpm)___ 495(@300wpm)
God, my heart ached for him.
For all those evenings when he’d been taken by the hand and delivered into absolute evil. No wonder he was so hung up on monogamy. He’d been forced to love countless women when all he ever wanted was one.
One mother. One lover. One heart.
He paused, his chest rising and falling, the knitted wound on his bicep from Kyle’s stabbing extra bright from the hot water. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to trap you. I’ll put you down—”
“It’s not that. I…I want you. I need all traces of him gone. But…only if you want me too. I won’t take from you. I won’t be like him.”
His face scrunched up with absolute awe. Fresh tears clung to his eyelashes. “You think you’re taking me against my will?”
“I’m making sure I don’t.”
He sighed heavily. “Fuck, Ilyana.”
New sadness tracked down my cheeks. I felt so sorry for Rachel. For everything she’d endured. I hated that she’d been forced to sleep with so many men. Despised that Henri had the same experience. Just because he hadn’t been violated in that way, he had been violated.
He’d been raped, over and over again.
Peter and the jewels were slaves here.
They were used and abused on a daily basis, but Henri?
He’d been a child when it started.
A baby of seven years old when he’d been forced to be with a woman in that way.
What did that do to him? How had he survived? All his urges and fetishes were nothing compared to the mess inside him.
A surge of protectiveness rose.
I wanted to slay every nightmare he’d endured.
I wanted to go back in time and slaughter his father.
I wanted to hug that little boy and promise him that eventually, he would be free of that life…only for him to step back into it as an adult.
I brushed his hair back as the shower continued to pummel us. “Do you think your memories came back because of this place? Being here? Reliving the past you repressed?”
He pursed his lips. “Pretty sure it was writing. I started off wanting to write about you and all the things I wanted to do to you. Instead, I ended up falling down a fucked-up rabbit hole.”
“That’s why you deleted everything? You didn’t want Victor to read it?”
“I didn’t want to read it. Or remember.” He huffed, widening his legs. “Pity I now remember everything.”
I slipped a little in his arms. I wriggled closer, trapping his cock between us.
He groaned, his forehead furrowing. “You keep doing that, and I won’t have the ability to talk for much longer.”
My stomach flipped. “Does the Viagra feel different? Less sensitive?”
“You’re still worried that I don’t want to do this?” He kissed me softly. “That I don’t want to do you?”
I kissed him back. “I will never take advantage of you. Regardless of what I need.”
“And that’s why you’re the most incredible person I’ve ever met.” His voice roughened. “I love you, Ily. So fucking much.”
Wrapping my arms around him, I hugged him.
He trapped me against the wall, quaking in my hold.
The same words danced on my tongue.
Pulling away, I asked quietly, “Did your brother know? What your father made you do?”
He flinched.
I worried he wouldn’t answer, but then he dropped his eyes and shrugged. “I don’t know. I only saw him a few times when I was dragged through the house. He was never there while it happened. I think…I hope he wasn’t aware. I do know he killed the bastard. I remember that too. I remember him appearing in the quarters where we were kept, holding a gun. The next day, we were all freed.”
“Do you think he would’ve sent you here if he’d known what you endured?”
“I don’t know.” He winced. “Unfortunately, I’ve probably killed him, so the chances of asking him are gone.”
Life seemed to narrow, knotting us together.
All the conversations in the kitchens. Peter’s urging; Rachel’s advice. They’d told me to see if Henri would fight on our side.
After tonight, I had no doubts.
His nostrils flared as he studied my face. “What? What is it?”
Heat throbbed between us, sex hung in the air, but our connection burned hotter.
My mind raced with a new plan.
One that’d begun the moment Victor thought he was helping by making Henri rape Rachel. “You said you were ready to play….You said you’re done with this place and your past, and…if that’s true, I have an idea.”
He wrenched back. Flicking a look at the camera in the corner of the bathroom pointing directly at the shower, he ducked his head by my ear. “We’ve already talked for too long. It’ll start to look suspicious if we don’t either fuck or I do something cruel.” His face scrunched up. “And I can’t hurt you again. Not tonight. To be honest, I’ll probably struggle for the rest of my life—”