Total pages in book: 76
Estimated words: 73191 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 366(@200wpm)___ 293(@250wpm)___ 244(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 73191 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 366(@200wpm)___ 293(@250wpm)___ 244(@300wpm)
It feels like my chest will cave in and crack open, and with it, the pain will pour out. But that doesn’t happen.
“This will not break you, Elizabeth. Do you hear me? It will not.” Milo stands, walks to his chest of drawers, and strips his clothes off. I curl myself into a ball. I remember her kind smile, and then I remember Cody’s.
“Lissie.” Soft hands touch me.
I open my eyes to find a face that I’ve only seen a few times. I don’t even know her name.
“I’m Bambi, Axe’s sister. Do you remember me?” I say nothing. “You’ve been in here all day, and you need to move. Milo was too afraid to touch you. But he had to go. Letti’s mother…” She pauses. “Letti’s mother needed him. He asked me to stay with you. I need you to move, Lissie.” Bambi touches me again, her hands soft and gentle. She goes to help me up, and I let her.
Standing, she puts her arm around my waist. “Milo doesn’t know what to do. He’s not used to emotions, but you really did a number on that man. He’s obsessed with you.”
“How can you be near me?” I ask.
The door opens, and Mason stands there. Bambi’s hands tighten around me as Mason’s bloodshot eyes lock on mine.
“The funeral is tomorrow. You need to be there,” he announces miserably. He pauses for a moment before continuing, “It’s not your fault.” I don’t know how he can have compassion for me in a moment like this. Both of us are so broken. “She would be so fucking mad if I was angry at you, it is not your fault. You did not control his actions,” he says, then turns and walks out.
“He’s right, you know.” I push her hand away and nod. “Your sister is at Milo’s House… she isn’t allowed here. But I am going to take you to her.”
My sister?
“Savannah,” I whisper, then I nod and follow her out.
She takes me straight to Milo’s house, where Savannah is waiting out front, still dressed in her uniform.
When I get out of the car, she wraps her arms around me and holds me tight.
I remember the first time I saw Letti.
And I remember the last.
As if it were all one.
It blurs my vision as well as my memories. They hurt. Hurt so much that I feel my heart being torn from my body.
She was a woman who showed me kindness when no one else would.
I’m not really sure how to stop loving her or Milo.
Or if that’s even possible.
Someone’s hand slips into mine, and I have to pull away. I hear the intake of breath from whoever it is, and I should care. But I don’t.
It’s not in me to care right now.
People around me are talking, and I look down to see my heels digging deeper and deeper into the ground. It’s wet, and by the looks of the sky, it’s going to rain again soon.
Very soon.
Running my hands down my black dress, I suck in my breath and try to hold it, wondering what they see right now when they look at me.
Black hair with tight curls I could never manage until I got older, mascara dripping down my face. Blinking through the tears that won’t stop soaking my eyes, I look straight ahead.
Where Letti is.
The one person who could make me laugh, the one person who pulled me from the darkness when all I wanted to do was to allow it to swallow me whole.
I feel the stares, and I wonder if they’re judging me, thinking I shouldn’t be here because it’s my fault.
“You can leave,” I manage to say to Milo, who I know is standing next to me. He mumbles something under his breath, and I stand tall where I am unable to move, my heels still sinking further into the damp ground until it feels like I am wearing flats.
“No.” I hear him say.
Lifting my hand, I swipe at my face. The rain has started falling again. And as I look to where Letti is, I wonder if she knows that I love her.
I do.
The dark brown casket begins lowering into the hole. And I fall to my knees as it does. My dress is covered in mud, and my new black heels have fallen off my feet. Probably still stuck deep in the ground where I stood.
I want to crawl to the casket with her.
Why?
Fucking why?
I hate this.
The only good person to ever be in my life and love me with all my flaws is being buried as I watch with disbelief.
The rain becomes heavier, and my hair sticks to my face. My clothes are clinging to my body.
I can’t look anymore.
I can’t.
“It’s time to go, Elizabeth.” Milo doesn’t wait for me to answer. When I glance up, I notice it’s just us here now because everyone else has gone. He lifts me and carries me to his car. “I want you to stay with me,” he says as he starts the engine.