Total pages in book: 47
Estimated words: 45210 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 226(@200wpm)___ 181(@250wpm)___ 151(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 45210 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 226(@200wpm)___ 181(@250wpm)___ 151(@300wpm)
KANAN
I’m pacing around the pond. It’s early in the morning, and I’m pretty sure I’m losing my shit. I can’t get everything that happened off my mind. All I can do is think about having Emerson in my arms, feeling better than I’ve ever felt in my life. For a short time, I let myself believe we could be together. I kissed her, tasted her, and satisfied her, and when she exploded underneath me, I came to my senses. No matter how much I want her, no matter how much I wish things were different, she can never be mine. I should have just told her the truth about her dad, and I wouldn’t have to worry about this. She wouldn’t want anything to do with me if I did that, but I couldn’t bring myself to hurt her like that.
“What the fuck, Kanan?”
I void any expression off my face and turn to Elias. “Thanks for coming.”
He’s pissed, and I can’t say I blame him. I called him in the middle of the night and asked him to meet me this morning. I’m just a few steps from my cabin, but it gives me some privacy to talk to Elias.
He’s shaking his head, but it doesn’t hide the curious gaze he’s giving me. “I’m sure you have a good reason for calling me in the middle of the night and having me meet you at the butt fuckin’ crack of dawn.”
“I do. I need a favor.”
He nods. He’s looking straight at me, which is not something he does with most people. He usually tries to look away to hide the scars on his face. “Whatever. You got it. What’s up?”
I feel sick even saying it. “I want you to go out with Emerson.”
He’s incredulous. “Excuse me? What?”
I cross my arms over my chest. “Look, she’s going to be out here in a minute. I need you to ask her out.”
He points his thumb at his chest. “Why the fuck me?”
“Because I know you won’t touch her.”
He blurts out a laugh. “Do you know how insane you sound right now?”
I lift my shoulders in a shrug. He’s right. I do sound insane, and fuck, maybe I am losing my mind right now. “Look, can you do it or not?”
He moves closer to me. “Explain this to me. Why do you want someone to ask out your girl?”
I raise my hand to interrupt him, but he stops me. “Don’t. Don’t even try to act like she’s not your girl because she is. Everyone here knows it. We all know she’s off limits, so what I’m trying to understand is why you’re trying to push her onto me.”
I flex my hands into fists at my sides. “I have my reasons.”
“So basically you’re not going to tell me why?” He measures me with a look, and he finally agrees. “Okay, yeah, sure, I’ll take her out.”
The pain in my chest is quick and sharp. I rub my hand over my chest. “Okay, so there’s rules.”
He smirks. “Of course there are. I mean, when you come up with stupid shit, I’m sure you’re just going to pile on some more stupid shit.”
I ignore his attempt at humor. “You can’t touch her, Elias.”
He rolls his eyes.
“I’m not joking about this. You don’t touch her. You treat her with respect. Take her out, show her a good time, show her there’s better men out there than me.”
He’s glaring at me. “You’re a fuckin’ idiot, you know that, right?”
I nod. “I’ll agree with you on that.”
He throws his hands up in the air. “Sure, what the fuck ever. I’ll take her out, show her a good time, hands to myself. I got it.”
We both turn when the door to my cabin opens. Emerson has her head tilted up to the sky, and even from here, I can see the sadness on her face. It guts me knowing that I’m the reason for that look. “Go,” I tell Elias.
He walks over to her as she comes down the steps of my porch. It takes everything I have to stay rooted in my spot when all I want to do is run over to them, throw her over my shoulder, and take her back to bed for days on end.
I watch them talk, and Emerson looks at me. I’m sure she’s waiting to see if I’m going to interrupt or anything, but I do what I think is best. I nod my head and encourage her with a small smile.
When Elias walks away, he doesn’t even look my way.
I wait for Emerson to come over to me. “You ready for work?” I ask her.
She crosses her arms over her chest. “Yeah, uh, you okay?”
I nod and start walking. It’s either that or I reach for her.
She walks beside me, and I go slowly so she can keep up. “I had water coolers delivered to the worksite. Lunch is being delivered to the garden at noon. I figured if you want to write during your lunch, you can eat while you do it.”