Total pages in book: 95
Estimated words: 91961 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 460(@200wpm)___ 368(@250wpm)___ 307(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 91961 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 460(@200wpm)___ 368(@250wpm)___ 307(@300wpm)
To me, I always felt like I had these blank, dead eyes, even as I was showing my pearly whites.
But there’s something so sincere happening in this picture, something present that I credit Frankie for bringing into my life.
“Well, you look good,” Frankie says. “I look like shit.”
“Shut up. We both look good,” I insist.
“Eh, I don’t know about that. I think you look a little better, Ev,” Frankie’s mom teases as she glances back at him. I see the warmth, the sincerity, the love in her expression. In such a simple look, I can see their history of leaning on one another, and I can’t help but envy that I never had anything like that…that there was never a parent in my life who loved me for me the way Frankie’s mom clearly loves him for him.
18
Frankie
“How much do I put in?” Evan asks my mom as they stand in front of the kitchen counter. When we finished at the park, we ran to Metropolis to change and then came home for dinner. We spent a little time hanging out in the backyard before Mom decided it was time to cook dinner. She wanted to be the one to do it this year since we have a guest, and Evan jumped in to help her.
“About a cup. I don’t typically measure anything out, but you’ll learn to eye it. Just pour it in, and I’ll tell you when to stop.”
“Are you sure I won’t mess it up?” he asks, making me frown. I hate that he questions himself so much. That he’s so worried about doing the wrong thing because people have taught him to fear that.
“I’m sure,” she replies. “But if you did, who cares? It’s not a big deal, mijo.”
Evan grins at her with the use of the nickname. It’s so strange seeing someone in the kitchen with my mom. I’ve never had a man home that I’m interested in before, and I’d be lying if I didn’t acknowledge there’s obvious interest. It’s new and surprising but then doesn’t feel new or surprising at the same time.
“She’s loving this,” my dad leans closer to me and whispers.
I know she is. My mom’s not dumb, and she knows the fact that Evan is here means something. If somehow she didn’t, I could tell by the way she watched us together today that she’s already come to her own assumptions. “He is too.” And he deserves this, people who treat him the way family is supposed to be treated.
A warmth spreads through my chest as I watch Evan cook with my mom. She teases him often and he laughs. Every once in a while, he’ll look my way with those big hazel eyes of his that are so fucking sexy but also sweet and innocent too. It makes me wonder if there was ever a time his own mother did things with him like this. Whether she did or didn’t, I’m glad he has it now, and guilt burns beneath my skin that I waited so long to bring Evan here. He deserved to have this sooner.
Once dinner is finished, the four of us sit around the table and my mom says, “Today was a good day because I’m here, I’m healthy, and I was lucky enough to get to meet Evan.” She reaches over and squeezes his hand.
With his other hand he reaches under the table, his hand tightening on my thigh. I place my palm over it, support him, let him know I’m here because I know how much what Mom just said means to him. And I also know there’s a part of him that wonders if he deserves it.
“It’s something we learned in therapy,” I tell him. “We don’t do it every day, but on this anniversary, we always share why it was a good day.”
He nods, his hand trembling against me.
“I’ll do next,” my dad adds, and I know he can tell Evan needs more time. “Today was a good day because my beautiful wife and Evan made this delicious meal together.”
Mom leans over and kisses his cheek.
“Aw, shucks, Dad. Thanks,” I tease. “Today was a good day because Dad didn’t try to cook because Mom wanted to impress Evan.”
“Hey! I’m not that bad!” Dad says as Mom laughs.
“I’m kidding. Today was a good day because I got to spend it with my three favorite people.”
Evan’s hand tenses briefly before he turns it over and threads his fingers through mine. “Today was a good day because you all made me feel so welcome and like…like I have a family.” Evan’s eyes dart down as though he’s embarrassed.
“Hey.” I use my free hand to hook my finger under his chin and turn his head to face me. I sweep his blond hair off his forehead. “What do you mean feel like? My feelings are hurt if you didn’t think of me as family before today.”