Total pages in book: 123
Estimated words: 114467 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 572(@200wpm)___ 458(@250wpm)___ 382(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 114467 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 572(@200wpm)___ 458(@250wpm)___ 382(@300wpm)
“But it didn’t,” one guy says. “Did you go after the girl?” he asks, and I nod. “Then you had the power over the drug. If the drug had the power, you would have stayed there and snorted the line. You would have said fuck her and just lost yourself in the high.”
“You aren’t supposed to fall in love in recovery,” I tell him.
“Doesn’t mean it doesn’t happen,” he says. “My wife now, I fell in love with her four months after rehab. I just didn’t know it because it was so pure. I wasn’t used to something that didn’t have anything to do with the drugs. I never knew what it was to feel without being high.”
Everyone nods now, including me. “Then it makes recovery just a touch easier because I wanted to be worthy of her. I wanted to be the man she could be proud of. That she can stand behind. Even if I wasn’t perfect, I wanted to be perfect for her.” He crosses his arms over his chest with a smile, and I see his wedding ring. I nod at him and then someone else starts talking. The whole time, my eyes never leave sight of his finger. The gold band so simple yet so perfect.
The snowfall is thicker when I leave, so I jump into a cab and make my way home. I walk in and toss my keys on the counter and shrug off the winter jacket. I walk over to the fridge and open it, pulling out a meal I had delivered. I turn on Sports Net and watch whatever is on there. My mind doesn’t really pay attention. I can’t shut it off Zoe, and I don’t want to.
Chapter Thirty
Zoe
I bury my head in work and then planning the baby shower for Zara. I have over twenty showings on houses, and it really is my busiest time of the year. When Candace comes in, I am not even ready. I’m still in my yoga pants. “You look amazing,” she says, coming into the house and greeting me with a hug. She wasn’t always so nice. When Zara started dating Evan, she was a bitch.
“Yeah, well, apparently being really busy and skipping meals is great for the waistline,” I joke. Yes, I’m busy, and yes, I’m eating, but it just is what it is.
“I have to go meet with a client,” she says when she finally settles into the guest room. I’m sitting in the middle of the bed putting up another listing. “Do you want to come with? It shouldn’t take me long, and then I’m thinking of hitting up some shops.”
I know what my answer is, but I have to get out. “That sounds like fun,” I tell her. “Let me just put on some jeans, and I’ll meet you downstairs.” She smiles, and I put on my black jeans and thick green sweater.
We walk out, making small talk about all her new clients, and it doesn’t even dawn on me who she might be meeting until I’m sitting at the table and see Viktor walk in. The whole world stops, or maybe it’s just my world that stops.
They say a picture is worth a thousand words, but they lied because there are no words to describe him. Just looking at him makes everything hurt, yet it makes me feel like I’m okay. That today will be just a touch better than yesterday, and it all happens in slow motion or maybe it’s the fact that everything around me suddenly quiets. There are no clinking plates, there are no spoons stirring coffee, and no chattering from the other tables—it’s just me and him. And when he finally looks around the restaurant, and our eyes meet, his face changes. The darkness of his eyes suddenly gets just a touch lighter, and they shine. He pulls off the beanie he was wearing, and he just stands there. Just looking at him makes the past three weeks just fade away.
“There he is,” Candace says from beside me, and she gets up to go meet him. He nods at her and takes her hand, but his eyes keep coming back to me. She turns and walks back to the table. “I think you guys already know each other, right?” We don’t say anything when he sits down in front of me. The table is suddenly too small. Everything is just smaller, and he’s too close and the smell I couldn’t remember is back; everything is back. I’m getting ready to jump out of my chair and make an exit when Candace’s phone rings, and she answers it. “Sorry, I’ll be right back.”
I want to yell at her to get back here, but nothing comes out. Nothing, not one single word. I think it’s going to be okay, and then he says my name. “Zoe.” And it’s just too much. I look down and blink away the tears.