Total pages in book: 49
Estimated words: 56149 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 281(@200wpm)___ 225(@250wpm)___ 187(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 56149 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 281(@200wpm)___ 225(@250wpm)___ 187(@300wpm)
It’s been three days since she woke up, and it’s not getting any better. I thought maybe once she got some distance, she would start to change her mind. Start to see what happened and realize that it was for the best. That all that mattered was that we were together.
I tried explaining it to her while she sat on the balcony and looked out at the ocean, but she wouldn’t acknowledge anything I said. I’ve tried to give her space. Not having her touch is eating me up inside.
Feeling the ache deep in my soul, I long to hold her to me and make it all okay. I don’t want to force her, but I just can’t see any other way. She has to snap out of this fog she’s in, or I’m afraid she’ll be lost to me forever.
“I’m going to do some fishing today. Good luck, Sean.” With that, Sal is gone, leaving me alone.
I walk to the lower patio that looks over the sandy beach. It’s so beautiful here, but I feel like a part of me is dead inside. I need Tessa to come back to me. I need her light to make my darkness go away.
I didn’t think it was possible for someone to get inside you, and imprint themselves into your skin so quickly, but it happened.
There is no me without her, and I know that there is no her without me. These feelings I have aren’t one sided, and as much as she’s upset with me, I know it’s still in there.
I know that even if she never forgives me, I can love enough for the both of us. And while I’m strong, I’m still weak without her. I’m not even half a man without her in my arms.
Making up my mind, I turn from the patio and walk towards our bedroom. She may fight me, and she may even hate me after, but I’ll make her see. I’ll make her remember what we had and that I only did what I did because I love her.
I’m going to remind her of our connection and how truly special it is. I’m going to remind her that my touch is the only touch she craves and that forgiving me is her only option. I’m sick to my stomach at not having her touch, and even if all she does is slap me, I’ll take it.
I’ll take even the smallest scrap of her attention. I’m just that desperate.
Chapter 22
Tessa
“Oh, God.” This has to be the best dream ever. I’m back in Sean’s bed, his head between my legs, his tongue stretching my tight opening, his beard scratching the inside of my thighs. His mouth makes love to me as his fingers force me to climax.
Everything else seems to just wash way. It’s just him and me, still in our perfect weekend.
“Cum for me, little fox. I need you,” he murmurs against my body before licking into my pussy with deep wet strokes. He goes back to my clit, dragging it into his mouth and sucking. Slipping two fingers inside me, he searches for my G-spot and sends me over the edge. My body coils and then succumbs as I call out his name, and the orgasm takes me.
I try to clamp my legs closed, but Sean buries his face deeper into the folds of my sex, making sure to get every drop of my orgasm. In my dream he’s soaking it all up and loving me with every inch of his mouth.
Too quickly the heat is gone and it makes my eyes open lazily. That’s when I remember.
Betrayal.
Death.
He used me to get into the bank, then he killed a man right in front of me.
It all comes crashing down on me. I stare at him as he sits in a chair in the corner of the room. He gazes back at me, licking his lips from the orgasm he just gave me. That was no dream. It was him. I roll over to face the other way. I don’t want to have my eyes on him.
I hate the way I feel about it. I feel like it’s ripping me in two. Part of me loves him, and part of me is so angry at him I can’t speak. I hate the part of me that loves him, but it’s still there.
Love isn’t just a switch you can flip on and off. I’ve learned that over the past few days. I loved him before I understood what was really happening, and that love doesn’t seem to be fading with this new knowledge. I’m not sure who I’m madder at, myself or him.
“You have to eat, baby.” I ignore him. It’s what I’ve been doing since I got here. I don’t want to talk to him because my ability to resist him isn’t so great. The only wall I can seem to keep up is silence. It wouldn’t take much to crack, even knowing the things I know. Does that make me pathetic? Knowing he used me for all of this, yet I still want him? He has blood on the very hands that have held me close at night. The hands that captured my face as he rained kisses all over me.
“You can’t go on not eating,” he tries again. He’s been on this eating thing since yesterday. To be honest I hadn’t even realized I hadn’t eaten. I think with all the crying, I just didn’t feel up to it. Nor was I hungry.
Now I am, but seeing how much it bothers him that I’m not eating, I’m doing it on purpose. It’s spiteful and immature, but I can’t find the energy to care. It might be childish, but I like seeing the misery on his face. I want him to be as miserable as I am. He did this to us. He ripped us apart and shattered everything. I should’ve known he was too good to be true.
He has taken everything from me: my life, my job, what few friends I had, and the man I thought I loved. He made me fall in love with him so he could use me. Then took me from the only home I’ve ever known.