Total pages in book: 105
Estimated words: 97557 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 488(@200wpm)___ 390(@250wpm)___ 325(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 97557 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 488(@200wpm)___ 390(@250wpm)___ 325(@300wpm)
After she shoves the bag into the hall, closes the door, and locks it, she faces me. She’s gorgeously, blindingly naked. Every single one of her curves and her scars mesmerizes me.
"Come on, let me clean you up." She holds her hand out, and there's nothing to do but take it and let her lead me into the bathroom.
She turns the water to hot, knowing it's how I like it, and tugs me into the shower stall. I'm already a little hard staring at her but she keeps things all business, carefully washing me, checking for any blood on my skin. Then she does the same for herself.
"Did I get it all?" she asks, the sudsy loofah still in her grasp.
I spin her a couple of times and nod. "I don't see anything. But come here. I need you."
She drops the soapy loofah and steps into me, gliding along my skin with her own soap-slick body.
I lean down and kiss her, taste her, feel her heat and warmth against me. Not just her physical beauty, but how she loves with her whole heart once she gives it, how she glows for me.
She swipes her tongue into my mouth, arching into me.
I melt into it, drawing her closer, until I reach down under her slick ass and lift her into my arms to bring us closer together. Moaning into my mouth, her arms circle my neck, further proof of her own desire.
"I need you, Ely."
"I'm not going anywhere," her voice is breathless, and drops of water drip off her long lashes. "Let's finish in the shower and climb into bed for a bit. I think we could both use some rest."
Of the two of us, she seems to be doing better than me with this whole murder business. Even when I killed my grandfather, I didn't feel this empty hole. How do I get rid of it completely?
Is this one more thing Tanya steals from me, even when she's no longer here?
I slowly lower Ely to her feet, and she leads me out of the shower again, passing me a towel. I buff at my skin, lost in the idea that I'll forever have this ache in my chest, this loss of...something. I don't even know what's supposed to be there.
Maybe the act of killing her drove this emptiness inside me, pushing apart my chest, my organs, allowing everything dark and ugly to take root inside me. A darkness I won't be able to shake. I come back to Ely cupping my cheeks gently.
"Hey, baby. Come on, let's get into bed." Her face is soft, a little smile on her lips, but her eyes are worried and searching as she looks into mine.
I nod and let her pull me behind her to the bed, then I climb up into the soft clean sheets beside her, rolling so I can look at her face while we lie here.
She mirrors me, her hands under her cheek, her knees curled up in front of her, all her bare pale skin gleaming in the soft light coming from the partially open bathroom door.
"Are you okay?"
I nod and then shake my head. "No, I don't think so, but eventually yes… yes I will be." No more secrets means I tell her when I'm not okay, too.
She skims her fingers down my cheek.
"I understand. I feel the same way. It's like you're scared you're going to turn into this monster, to give into the darkness, and let it eat you from the inside out."
I nod. "Yes, and it feels easier to let it."
Her fingers tighten, hooking around my jaw. "At first, yes, but you won't, right? You're stronger than that. I'm stronger than that. We are strong together."
I swallow the lump in my throat and merely nod. It does feel so much easier to give into this pain threatening to eat me up. In the end, Tanya wouldn't even try to make amends, even offer a real apology. She was my stepmother for so many years, until she changed into something ugly and shameful. Now she's a corpse, and some part of that little boy wants to feel bad for it, to feel guilty, but the man won't let him. Won't allow me to feel guilt for destroying her for everything she did to us. She deserved it…worse, even. I just wish she'd apologized or shown some tiny shred of understanding or remorse for what she put me through.
I tug myself from my wandering thoughts and reach to pull Ely closer. "Come here. I need you."
With the memories of the past threatening to spill over into nightmares, I need the scent of her body in my lungs, the feel of her skin against mine. "Be my anchor, keep me here with you," I whisper.
She shifts closer, sliding along the sheets hips first until our bodies collide.