Total pages in book: 59
Estimated words: 57201 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 286(@200wpm)___ 229(@250wpm)___ 191(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 57201 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 286(@200wpm)___ 229(@250wpm)___ 191(@300wpm)
Still, I couldn’t hate her completely because I’m the asshole who wrote her that damn letter. I’m the one who pushed her away, and slowly, I’m beginning to realize I made her feel like she couldn’t confide in me about Lennon. That doesn’t condone what she did, but then again, I’m not blameless either. We were both young and stupid—and I’m more of the last. I can’t go back, but I can go forward, and I need to do that. I need to do that for Lennon and for me. The thing is, I’m not sure I can handle watching my brother come back and take my place in Lennon’s world—in Katie’s.
They belong to me. There’s still chemistry between me and Katie. That much was clear earlier when we were working on her water leak. I can use that to my advantage. I need to make this work because if I have to see my brother taking the role of father to my son….
I won’t be able to keep from killing him.
“You look like a man with a lot on his mind.”
I grimace and turn to look at Reed. I love him. In a lot of ways, he’s been closer than my own brother to me. It’s hard to be around him right now, though. He kept Katie and Jeff’s secret. He knew about Lennon and didn’t tell me. Hell, everyone here did. My mother did and Jeff? I will never forgive him. I don’t have it in me, and I don’t give a fuck what that says about me.
It’s just true.
“I guess I do.”
“I know you’re still pissed at me.”
“Now’s not the time, Reed.” I tell him, watching Katie, Callie, and Lennon, as they talk about some new movie that Lennon wants to see.
Miss Hazel laid down for a nap about an hour ago, and it’s getting late. I’m going to have to head home soon, but I’d be the first to admit that I don’t want to leave. Things are tense at Mom’s lately, that’s true. It’s not that, though. I feel more relaxed here than I have in ages. It’s damn confusing, but it’s true just the same.
“We need to talk about things, Jake.”
“Maybe. I’m not sure anything either one of us could say would change a damn thing.” Reed doesn’t respond, but then, there’s not a lot he can say. “You and Callie look happy,” I finally respond, not wanting the awkwardness between the two of us but unable to figure out how to change anything. I’m also wondering why I even try. He helped keep my son from me.
Fuck, life just keeps being complicated.
“We are,” Reed says, the words practically hum with contentment.
I shake my head. I’ve adored Katie forever. She was the woman who taught me about love. Hell, she’s the only woman I’ve ever loved, but when we broke up, I didn’t stop living. Reed? Without Callie, he stopped. For him, it was always her, and without her, he only half existed. I’m glad they found their way back to one another. I truly am. I’m even more than a little envious. At the same time, he always made me feel like I was lacking. I chose my dreams over a woman who wouldn’t travel and live those dreams with me. Reed? He got what millions of people can only dream of, and he would have given it all up for Callie. Hell, he’s basically pushed his career as the hottest country music star around to the sidelines to be here with Callie and build a life with her—and he’s happy as hell about it. I look at Katie and Lennon, and I’m filled with regret, but would I have changed everything for them? I would have tried like hell to take them along with me. To build a life like so many men I knew had—a life that Katie didn’t truly want. I would have tried to make sure she didn’t regret it, but I couldn’t give up my dreams for her.
I’m not Reed. He’s a better man than me—he always has been. I still would have tried with everything in me to be a good husband and father. As I watch Katie laughing, her hand gently combing through my son’s hair, in a home she loves, filled with memories of Miss Hazel, I know that probably wouldn’t have been enough. I’m wondering if it would be now. Things have changed. I’ve been on the circuit for a while. I have a name. I have money. I can dictate what events I take part in because I’m not after the prize as much anymore. Since hurting my shoulder, I’m not even in the running this year, and I miss it here and there, but the time off has been nice. Still, I know I’ll eventually go back on the circuit. How will Katie deal with that if I try to have a relationship with her?