Total pages in book: 103
Estimated words: 98207 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 491(@200wpm)___ 393(@250wpm)___ 327(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 98207 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 491(@200wpm)___ 393(@250wpm)___ 327(@300wpm)
Lachlan takes over, shouting out directions.
“Conor, take Sasha home.”
I try to argue, but I can’t even speak. Mack gives me a worried look and then pulls Lachlan across the room where they start to argue. But it doesn’t matter. One look at Ronan, and I know he doesn’t want me here. I never should have come here.
I stand up on shaky legs and nod at Conor. He helps me across the room, and Mack runs over to meet us at the door.
“I’m so sorry, Sash,” she says. “They gave him something to knock him out. It must have done something. I don’t know. But it’ll be okay, I promise.”
I give her a nod because I can do nothing else.
It’s the lie we all want to believe. That it will be okay.
The problem is that it never really is.
Chapter Nine
Ronan
From my bed, I listen to the deep voice by the door. The man is big and strong and has brown eyes like me. The lady who looks after us said he is my father. But I do not know him. I know nothing but these four walls. And these three other lads beside me.
And this lady. The nice lady who looks after us, but tells us not to speak.
I do not even know her name. But she’s all I’ve ever known. This lady and these four walls. She is not my mammy. I do not know who my mammy is. But this man, she says, is my da.
He comes to the bed where I am and sits beside me. I curl my knees up and look at him, wondering if he’s come to take me home. This place is all I’ve ever known, but these other lads, they say that they came from other homes. They say I must have a home too, somewhere.
“You are a good lad,” the man says. “I’ve heard many reports about you, my son.”
“Am I coming to live with you now?” I ask him.
“No,” he says. “You will continue to live here until you finish training. This is the way soldiers are made.”
They always tell me the same words, but I don’t understand them.
“I have something very important I need ye to do for me today, son.”
“What is it?” I ask.
He holds out his hand, and I stare it.
“Come with me,” he says.
“To where?”
“Today marks a special day. Today you are eight years old. And today your training will begin.”
He takes my hand in his. It’s warm and big and it feels strange. I don’t think I ever remember someone touching me before. The lady who feeds us never touches us. She says it is not allowed.
My da opens the door, and I freeze.
“I am not allowed to go out the door,” I tell him.
He smiles at me. “Today you are, son.”
I don’t want to go out there. But he pulls me through and shuts the door behind us. The air is warm, and it smells strange. Everything feels strange. My eyes try to adjust to the darkness as I’m pulled along.
When we turn the corner, there is a large fire blazing. And people. A lot of people. I’ve never seen them before, but they are all staring at me.
My father kneels down in front of me and meets my eyes. “Do ye remember everything the lady has been teaching you in that room, son?”
I nod. I always listen carefully so I don’t miss anything she says.
“So ye remember then that we must make sacrifices to prepare for a better future. And today, Ronan, you will become known by another name. You will become a man. A future soldier. And after tonight, you will not see me again until you finish training.”
“But I only just met you,” I argue.
“This is the way soldiers are made,” he says.
His eyes are wet and it makes me nervous.
“I know that you will do me proud, Ronan.”
He musses the top of my hair and then leads me towards the people. They are split into two groups, and between them is a large pit. A beam lies across the center like a bridge, only it’s very narrow.
“You stand here,” my da says. “And I’m going to walk to the other side. And when I tell ye to, you must walk across that beam towards me, Ronan. And ye must only look at me as you do it. No matter what anyone says or does. You only look at me. And you cross the beam. Do ye follow?”
I nod, even though I really don’t.
He lets me go and walks around the pit, and the people are starting to yell things at me. They are all watching me. I try not to listen and do as my father says. When he tells me to, I steady my feet and move onto the beam.
When I look down below me, I get scared. It’s a long way down, and I don’t want to fall. My father directs me to move, and I try to remember everything the lady has taught us. That we must always do as we are told straight away without any hesitation.