Total pages in book: 90
Estimated words: 84533 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 423(@200wpm)___ 338(@250wpm)___ 282(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 84533 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 423(@200wpm)___ 338(@250wpm)___ 282(@300wpm)
He’d deserved those words, but I wished I hadn’t given them to him, knew they would just show him how broken I was, how much work I was.
Crow didn’t speak right away, just flipped me so I lay on my back on the couch, and came down on top of me. He brushed my hair off my forehead and traced the freckles on my face. “You.”
“Me what?”
“You give me you. Not just your ass. All of you. Your…feelings, your words, your smiles. You.” He shook his head as if he was doing something wrong, and my breath caught, unable to break free. “I…” Crow squeezed his eyes shut before opening them again. “Only need you. Mine.” Crow held on to my throat, with just a little pressure, but also brushing his fingers over my pulse.
“Yours,” I promised him, voice cracking. Always and forever I would belong to Crow.
“That’s more than I ever thought I would have, little lamb.” His hold on my neck tightened, and I wrapped my legs around him. My dick was hard now, throbbing against him as I thrust and rolled my hips. “Mine,” he said again.
“Yours,” I said, knowing my throat vibrated against his hand while I spoke. When he let go, I gasped, wanting him to do it again.
Before I could ask, he said, “Tell me about her.”
“My mom?” I played with those long strands of his hair, kept my legs wrapped tight around him. My eyes were already watering because I wanted to share her, so much. The good parts of her that deserved more attention.
Crow nodded, so I did.
“Christmas was her favorite holiday because she said people were kinder this time of year. When we had money, she would spoil me, buy me so many things we couldn’t afford. And when we didn’t, she still tried to make it the best day. We would go outside and have snowball fights and make snow angels. We painted a Christmas tree on the wall once because we didn’t have the money to buy one.”
On and on and on, I shared story after story about my mom with Crow, showing him how special and perfect she was, even though she was an addict. People tended to hear drugs and automatically write someone off as a bad person, but she wasn’t. She was the best person I’d ever known, followed by the man allowing me to keep her memory alive.
“She called me her sun—like sunshine. It’s why she named me Cyrus. It means sun, and she said her world was dark before me and I brought light into her life.”
It wasn’t until Crow began wiping my cheeks that I realized I was crying, tears pouring down in uncontrollable waves. When he couldn’t catch them all with his fingers, he leaned in, mouth against my cheek, kissing and licking them away. I loved it. Loved him. Crow had still never kissed me on the lips, and I longed for it, but this was almost as good, his mouth touching my face over and over and over, catching my salty tears on his lips and tongue.
When they finally stopped falling, he leaned forward, rubbing his scratchy cheek against mine, his beard rough but exactly what I needed.
“One day I want you to take me just like this, Crow, with me on my back and you looking into my eyes so you can see how much I belong to you while you fuck me.”
He gave a deep rumble, buried his face into the side of my throat, bit and sucked.
“Ahhh!” I cried out at the sharp pain, while my hand fisted his hair and I pulled him closer so he knew how much I wanted it.
Crow marked me, making me throb as he pulled the blood to the surface. All too soon, it was over. He eased back and looked down at me, brushing our noses together. “My little lamb…”
I smiled and felt him do the same.
We stayed there for a long while, breathing each other’s air. When he backed away some, I missed the contact. He still lay against me, but our heads didn’t touch. When I saw his smile, though, it was worth it.
With a shaky hand I touched it, traced his lips with my fingers. Then I kissed two of my digits and pressed them against his lips. He sucked them into his mouth, twisting his tongue around them.
“I love you,” I whispered, then held my breath.
Crow released my fingers, confusion clear on his face. “Why?”
“Because I was meant to love you. I exist to love you, to belong to you.”
Crow’s expression was so soft, so gentle, while at the same time, his eyes were wild, untamed. He answered by leaning in and pressing his lips to mine, just once, but it was all the answer I needed. Somehow, even though I wasn’t anything special, Crow loved me too.