Total pages in book: 90
Estimated words: 84533 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 423(@200wpm)___ 338(@250wpm)___ 282(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 84533 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 423(@200wpm)___ 338(@250wpm)___ 282(@300wpm)
My eyes shot to the door when there was a knock.
Don’t do this. Don’t answer.
But how could I call him, then let the man jump on a plane, only to ignore him now? I reminded myself I’d told him I didn’t want drugs, that I didn’t want to fuck, that I just needed a friend. After everything we’d been through, Eddie should be able to give me that much.
I cleared my throat, made sure I had my happiest smile on my face, and opened the door. “Hey, you.”
He was dressed in slacks and a button-up shirt, as usual. Eddie had money. A lot of it. And he used that money to have a lot of fun.
“Jesus, Cyrus. A small town called Tranquility? What the fuck are you doing here?” He stepped inside, held my face in his hands, and kissed me, but I pulled back.
“I like it. The name is cute, and I needed a change.”
“Well, this is certainly a change.”
I went deeper into my living room, and he closed the door.
“It’s dark in here. This apartment is…let’s say old.”
“Christ, Eddie. Don’t start already. I didn’t call you here to critique everything about me.”
His blond hair was perfectly styled, again, same as always. He gave me the grin that always got him his way. His smooth skin was flawless, no stubble on his face. He looked like he belonged on a runway, and I never understood why a man like him had paid me any attention.
Because he can get what he wants out of you. Because he knows you’re dying for attention, and he uses that to control you.
“You’re right, babe. I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to insult your little apartment here. It suits you.”
A thinly veiled dig. This was definitely a mistake.
“Have a seat. Do you want something to drink?”
“Do you have any wine?”
I shook my head. “I stopped drinking in rehab. No alcohol. No drugs. Nothing. It’s been eighteen months.” I beamed, proud of my accomplishment.
He huffed. “Yeah, right.”
“I’m serious.”
“Nothing at all? You haven’t touched anything since that night?”
I closed my eyes, trying to forget that. It had been the worst night of my life outside of when I lost my mom. ODing was…scary. What I remembered of it, at least. “I’ll get you some ice water.”
I was surprised when Eddie didn’t argue or call me on not answering his question. I ignored the pang in my gut at him not believing I could stay sober. It sucked not being believed.
When I went back into the living room, I handed him his glass. Eddie was sitting on the couch, and patted the seat beside him.
Don’t sit there, don’t sit there, don’t sit there.
I sat there. Of course I did.
“So…what are you doing now?”
“I work at a hardware store. It’s not the best job in the world, but it pays the bills.”
We rambled on for a little while about random things. He told me what our old friends were up to, how great his business was going, how much money he was making, and about all his wild parties. Eddie had always thrown the best parties. Everyone wanted to go to them. Coke and sex everywhere.
I shifted as my leg began to bounce.
“What’s wrong, babe?” Eddie asked, pushing my hair behind my ear. It felt wrong, but he’d literally jumped on a plane to come see me. Shouldn’t I try to be nice?
“Nothing. I just…” Just what? I didn’t know.
“I’ve missed you, did you know that?” Eddie continued on because he didn’t really care what was wrong with me anyway. “It broke my heart when you left.”
“I almost died. I went into rehab.” He made it sound like I just up and walked out.
“I know, and I was worried sick about you. I kept trying to get in contact with you, and all you did was ignore me. How do you think that made me feel? When my boyfriend almost died and then dropped me like I didn’t matter.”
That was kind of a dick move on my part. Eddie had done a lot for me, and we had been dating. I shouldn’t have dropped him cold turkey. I should have explained to him and—no!
“You know I love you, Cyrus. We were good together. No one else would understand your quirks and moodiness.”
He’d never understood it either, but then, he’d stayed with me, hadn’t he? That meant something.
“You love the way I set you free. The way I let you be my little slut without any judgment. I never judged you for any of the things that are wrong with you.”
He brushed the back of his hand along my cheek the way Crow had, but it felt different, made my skin crawl. He was already manipulating me, already trying to get inside my head, and it was working. It would be so easy to go back with Eddie. To let him take care of me, make me feel wanted, and feed me drugs so I could forget all the other shit.