Total pages in book: 62
Estimated words: 60852 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 304(@200wpm)___ 243(@250wpm)___ 203(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 60852 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 304(@200wpm)___ 243(@250wpm)___ 203(@300wpm)
His words are terrifying, mostly because I know he means them.
He runs a thumb over my bottom lip, and I have so much I want to say, but my body is exhausted, and I can’t manage a single word as my eyes grow heavy.
“I told Ebony you were in a car accident because it was the only thing that wouldn’t terrify her for the rest of her fuckin’ life. She understands, but not enough for it to be too traumatic. She will want to see you, but Jaybird, it’s goin’ to be tough on her.”
Do I look that bad?
Am I really that messed up?
Poor Ebony.
She doesn’t deserve this.
I shake my head, fighting through the exhaustion to mutter a few words. “Don’t let her see me until I’m a bit better. Please.”
Muff hesitates, but then he nods. “Whatever you want, baby.”
Baby.
Oh, how I’ve longed to hear that word.
My eyes close, and I exhale, pain and relief, a mixture of both. The doctor showed me a button by my bed that I can press anytime the pain gets too bad. Reaching for it, I take it in my hand and press, letting the warmth wash over me as sleep takes hold.
I don’t know if Muff stays or leaves, but either way, I fall into blissful darkness once more.
THREE WEEKS LATER
“I can’t fuckin’ find him,” Muff bellows, storming through the front door of our house where I’m lying on the sofa, Serenity by my side, the guys here installing some new security.
Muff has been looking, every single day since the attack—he hasn’t stopped.
I don’t know that he’ll ever find Wesley, but I know he’s not going to give up easily.
Things have been chaotic, to say the least.
Whatever message Wesley delivered to the club has them in a frenzy. They’ve been secretive, angry, and going on a lot of rides. None of the old ladies know anything, but we do know they’ve increased security at the compound, the houses, and we’re not allowed to go anywhere alone. That in itself tells me they’re afraid of something – but what? What could they possibly have to hide that is so bad?
The answer to that isn’t something I can handle right now.
I’m back at home, recovering slowly. Ebony and Max stay here with Muff and me, but I sleep in the spare room downstairs. I’m not ready to go back there with Muff, even though he’s making sure I know he’s not giving up easily. Every single day he is trying to prove to me that he made a mistake, but my heart is so broken, so damaged, that I’m struggling to let him back in. I’m struggling to accept the fact that even for a second, he was willing to consider a life without me.
I just don’t know if I can handle living with that feeling.
“Calm down,” Spike orders, walking out with a hammer in his hand, where he has been installing a camera. “Nothin’ you can do is goin’ to make him appear. We’ll find him, but it’s goin’ to take time.”
“I don’t have fuckin’ time,” Muff roars. “That fucker is out there, roaming around, and he could come back anytime he likes after his little threat. I’m not resting until I bring him down.”
Serenity glances at me, giving me an ‘uh oh’ expression.
“I said,” Spike growls, “we’ll figure it out. Now is not the place to discuss this.”
Muff pauses, looking over to me on the sofa, and immediately he calms down. Whatever they don’t want us to know, they’re making sure it stays hidden. That worries me, because the last secret in our world ruined my damned life. I don’t need another one coming out that will crush us all over again.
“You good?” Muff asks, walking over and stopping in front of me.
“Yeah,” I nod. “Good.”
He forces a smile.
We’re both holding so much in, but we haven’t really had much time alone to sit down and talk about it. I’ve been avoiding it, if I’m being honest, because I’m scared of what will come out if we open that box. I don’t know what the status with Harper is, even though Muff told me he wants to come home. She’s still in town, so I’m guessing for her, it isn’t over.
I don’t know where I stand.
I don’t know what I want.
I love him with my whole heart, but right now, my heart is still broken.
“We’re done here,” Cade walks in, sweat trickling down his forehead, his dark shirt stuck to his chest.
These men really should stop being so good looking.
“Thanks, brother,” Muff murmurs. “Appreciate it.”
Jackson walks over to Serenity, who is watching Ava play on the ground with Max. He leans over the back of the sofa and presses a kiss to her temple, murmuring something that has her cheeks growing pink. Then, he straightens, and she quickly stands. “Are you going to be okay for a few hours, honey? Do you want me to take Max?”