Total pages in book: 62
Estimated words: 60852 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 304(@200wpm)___ 243(@250wpm)___ 203(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 60852 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 304(@200wpm)___ 243(@250wpm)___ 203(@300wpm)
His voice cracks, and it breaks my heart.
I wish I could tell him I’m okay, but I honestly don’t know if I am.
I don’t know anything anymore.
16 – Janine
BLARING LIGHTS ARE the first thing I see when I manage to open my eyes for the first time. Hospital lights maybe, I’m not certain. The incessant beeping of machines around me is so distracting, I know I couldn’t be anywhere else. I try to swallow, only to be stopped by a large tube in my throat. Gasping, I try to claw it out as I gag and squirm, panic setting in.
“Janine, it’s okay. We’re going to get this out. It’s okay.”
A woman’s voice is all I can hear as hands move quickly around my face before someone pulls the tube out. Coughing, I try to swallow over and over again but it seems as though my body has forgotten how.
“It’s okay. You’re in the hospital. Just try to calm down, you’ll be okay.”
Through my blurred vision, I see a woman beside me, holding a cup of water. She carefully brings it to my lips, and I take a small sip, thankful my body remembers how to get it down this time. My throat is scratchy, and I feel drugged, dazed, and a little confused. My face feels puffy and swollen, and when I try to rub my eyes, the sharp stinging sensation stops me.
“You’re in the hospital, Janine,” the woman tells me, “you’ve got a lot of bruising on your face so try not to rub it. You’re in ICU. You were in a bad way when you came in.”
That’s an understatement.
My vision clears just enough for me to see I’m in a room alone, hooked up to a lot of machines. One of my arms is bandaged, I feel some type of compression on my ribs and my abdomen is sore, like really fucking sore. I shift slightly, groaning at the onslaught of pain. It feels as though it’s hitting me from every angle.
“You had surgery for some internal bleeding and damage, you’re going to be very sore. You have some broken ribs, a fractured wrist, and a lot of swelling and bruising, but thankfully you didn’t break any more bones. It’s a miracle you’re alive.”
Yes, it would seem it is.
I look to her, and she smiles down. “I’m going to get the doctor to come in.”
Leaving the room, I turn my head and stare at the mass of machines by my bed. How long have I been here? My mind immediately goes to Ebony and Max. They would be terrified seeing me like this. Are they okay? Did someone hurt them? I need to know that they’re safe. I need to know that Wesley didn’t get anywhere near them.
When the nurse returns with a doctor, I raise my good hand to call her over. Walking to my bedside, she stops and leans down to better hear me. “My kids. Are my kids okay?”
“I’ve just called your husband; he is on his way. As far as I know, they’re okay, everyone is okay.”
Exhaling with relief, I close my eyes again as the doctor begins his checks, asking me questions and going over every damned inch of me.
My eyes only open again when I hear his voice.
His beautiful, broken voice.
“She’s awake.”
“She is.”
Then, his hand is on my face. My eyes flutter open, and I look to him, with his bloodshot eyes and hair that is tied messily atop his head. He looks like he hasn’t slept for days. I reach up, my finger stroking over his swollen lip. How did that happen? He takes my hand, turning his face into it and closing his eyes. My heart breaks. It just shatters.
“I’ve fucked a lot of things in my life up, Jaybird, but I will never forgive myself for what I did to you.”
A lump forms in my throat as I stare at him.
He releases my hand and leans down, his fingers gliding through my hair as his face lowers to mine. He runs his lips over my forehead, and I close my eyes, just taking him in for a moment, letting this feeling wash over me, a feeling I’ve so desperately wanted for months now.
“I will spend every single day of my life makin’ it up to you, and if you don’t want me, I’ll still spend every single fuckin’ day of my life makin’ it up to you.”
A tear leaks out of my puffy eye, and he swipes it away, staring down at me with those glassy eyes of his.
“And hear me when I say, I will find the fucker who did this to you, and I’ll gut him, slowly, while he screams for mercy. With every single scream, I’ll make him say your name, so the last person he thinks of when he takes his final breath is you. You’ll be the last face in his mind as I end him, and I will end him, Jaybird.”