Total pages in book: 91
Estimated words: 86841 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 434(@200wpm)___ 347(@250wpm)___ 289(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 86841 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 434(@200wpm)___ 347(@250wpm)___ 289(@300wpm)
The white collar standing out in the darkness against the black shirt he wore with jeans mocked me. I thought I hated it.
“When I was a freshman in high school, I met a girl,” he said.
I held up a hand and let out a hard laugh. “Uh, no thank you. I do not want story time about the girl you loved.”
He sighed, closing his eyes briefly, then looked at me. The pleading in his expression got to me, and I hated that too. I didn’t want to be weak around him.
“Please, Saylor. I need you to listen so you can understand.”
“Oh, I understand, Father. I understand that I was your first sexual experience and you wanted more. I told you the truth. I gave you my story. And you used it to send me packing. Not just from you, but also from something I enjoyed. Something that gave me a purpose and I needed that.”
He took another step toward me, and I took one back. We were keeping a distance, thank you very much. I did not want to smell him. It was my birthday, and I didn’t deserve that kind of torture. Speaking of which, Halo had sent me out here. She’d planned the party, and now, Jude was here. I took back all the nice things I’d thought about her. She was on my shit list. So was Gathe. They could all go to hell.
“I know. It has been hard to look at myself in the mirror all week. I don’t want to get up. I sure don’t want to go to my office, where I can see where you’re supposed to be. Where I want you to be. And we will get to that, but I need you to please just let me explain something to you.”
He wanted me to be there. I was foolish, and I was weak, but that one sentence had me caving in. I was going to listen to his love story. Let him take another piece of my soul and shred it. Because he wanted me there.
“Tell me,” I said, scowling.
I already loathed every word that was about to come out of his mouth.
“I met Delana. We were young. She was beautiful, sweet, kind, and I fell in love. She was it for me. I didn’t even look in another girl’s direction. My family was Catholic, but we didn’t really go to church. It was a Christmas and Easter thing we did, but that was it. Delana’s family was different. I went with her to Mass, to youth groups there. I can admit I would rather have spent more time doing other things with her, but it made her happy, and that was all I wanted.”
“Okay, I get it; she was perfect, and you loved her. Get on with it,” I snapped, tired of listening to how good she had been. Another Halo to make the males fall at her feet and worship.
“Our junior year, near Christmas, Delana started getting breathless. We would be walking in the halls to classes, and she’d get winded. It was concerning, but she would laugh it off and say she needed to get more exercise. Then, the sharp pains in her legs started, and her mom took her to the doctor. They listened to her symptoms and said it sounded like a viral infection, but if it didn’t get better in the next week, they’d run some tests.
“Four days later, she fainted while walking out to get in my car for school. Her dad picked her up, and they rushed her to the ER. I followed, and we stayed. They took blood tests, and we waited there for several hours. The doctors asked to speak to her parents, and I was left in the waiting room.” He paused and took a deep breath.
I did not want to feel anything, but I couldn’t help it. I wanted to go wrap my arms around him and hold him. Comfort him over the loss of the girl he loved. Even if thinking about him loving someone like that killed me.
“She had acute myeloid leukemia; it was very advanced, and her blood platelets were dangerously low. I won’t go into details. It was bad, but she was a fighter. She was in the hospital for months. I went every day after school. When she was able to go to the chapel in the hospital, I’d go with her for Mass. We played card games. I read her books.
“That summer, she got to come home. She was in remission, and I’d thought we’d been given a miracle. Our senior year was perfect, and then two days before prom, she fainted.” He ran a hand through his hair and looked off toward the moon instead of at me for a moment.
“It was back, and she was gone within six months. In the end, when she accepted that she wasn’t going to beat it this time, she told me that she loved me. That she had been given the gift of being loved by someone as special as me and that she wanted me to live a life for both of us. Do something big. Leave a mark.