Total pages in book: 90
Estimated words: 91767 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 459(@200wpm)___ 367(@250wpm)___ 306(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 91767 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 459(@200wpm)___ 367(@250wpm)___ 306(@300wpm)
“Do you always fidget when you’re nervous?” he asks.
“What?”
“Your leg.”
I glance down to see my leg bouncing and I put my hand on my thigh to stop it.
What the hell is wrong with me?
“Oh…sorry, I didn’t realize.” I look around for an excuse for my kindergarten behavior. “You’re….” I shrug as I search for the right wording. “Intimidating.”
A trace of a smile flashes across his face and he takes a slow sip again. “What are you doing here?”
“I….” I swallow the lump in my throat. “I….”
He raises an impatient eyebrow.
Fuck it. Just tell him the truth.
“I’m living out a bucket list for my best friend.”
“A what?”
“My best friend wrote me a list before she passed of the ten things that she wanted to do in her life.” I take a sip of my drink, feeling braver. “This is me fulfilling wish number nine. I promised her I would do each and every last one.”
“This isn’t even something that you want to do?”
“It wasn’t…but, now that…you’re….” My mouth is so dry I can’t even talk.
The truth is you’re gorgeous and the thought of fucking you in any shape or form excites me.
He frowns as he thinks for a moment. “What else was on the list?”
“Lots of things.” I shrug. “Travel. A sex show in Amsterdam.” My brain has gone completely blank under his scrutiny. “Umm…. A tattoo. And ballooning in Cappadocia.”
“Anything else sexual?”
“Umm….” Oh god, why did I openly admit this? “A threesome.”
His fascinated eyes hold mine and he sips his drink.
“And I did that…. A few years ago now, actually.”
“And?”
“I….” I shrug, embarrassed. “I couldn’t bring myself to do two men so I thought I would add another woman and….” My voice trails off.
“And what?”
“I learned that I don’t like to share,” I blurt out in a rush.
A trace of a smile crosses his face. “I don’t share either.”
“Right? I think it’s weird that people do.” I smirk, feeling a little more of my equilibrium return.
We fall silent and he sips his drink as if in deep in thought. “I’ll have your money refunded. I apologize for wasting your time.”
Disappointment runs through me.
“What?” I frown. “Why?”
“I’m….” He gives a subtle shrug as he tries to articulate himself. “This will not be advancing to the next stage.”
“Why not?”
He gestures to the air that is crackling between us.
“What does that mean?”
“The physical attraction between us is too strong.”
He feels it too.
I fight the goofy smile that is threatening to cover my face. “Isn’t that the point?”
“From your perspective perhaps, from mine most definitely not.”
What’s he doing here?
“Do you think you’re gay?” I ask.
“Absolutely not.”
“It’s okay if you are.”
He stands as if outraged and walks toward the door.
He’s leaving.
“What are you doing?” I splutter in a panic.
“This is not working.”
“Stop.” I stand too. “We’ve gone to all this trouble to get here and we are obviously attracted to each other so what’s the point of not seeing where it goes?”
“I know where it goes and it doesn’t go there,” he spits angrily.
It suddenly dawns on me, he’s nervous. This is out of the normal for him too.
“So show me where it does go.” I gesture to the couch. “Sit down and…try and relax.” I take the glass out of his hand and go to the bar; I refill it and hand it back over. “Drink this one hundred percent alcohol,” I instruct him. “Although I think it’s illegal to drink this in most countries.” I take a shaky sip and I feel it burn all the way down. “But in a Switzerland sex kink club I guess anything goes.”
His eyes hold mine and I know he’s only seconds from leaving.
“Sit down please, Mr Doe,” I whisper. “Don’t go.”
He hesitates before finally taking a seat on the couch and we fall silent again.
I have no idea what’s going through his head.
“I don’t like that you’re doing this only because you are being forced,” he says.
“I’m not being forced. I wanted to fulfill my friend’s wishes and to be honest now that I’ve met you—” I sip my drink as I try to muster up my courage, “—I think it will be very enjoyable to spend some time naked with you.”
He gives me a slow sexy smile and sits back in his chair. “I’m a lot to take on.”
There is no air in my lungs.
None.
I shrug, feeling like he’s warning me.
“You said you were attracted to me?” I whisper.
“Don’t act like you can’t feel it.”
We stare at each other, the magnetic pull toward him is so strong that I can hardly fight it.
Suddenly I just want the awkward fear gone. I want to get this over with.
Whatever this is.
“What happens now in a place like this?” I ask nervously.
His eyes hold mine.
“I’ve never been in a situation like this.” I begin to babble on. “Do we date? Do we small talk? Do we eat dinner?” My eyes search his as I beg him to take control. “What do I do?”