Total pages in book: 78
Estimated words: 73930 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 370(@200wpm)___ 296(@250wpm)___ 246(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 73930 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 370(@200wpm)___ 296(@250wpm)___ 246(@300wpm)
“That’s Duke, right?” Kelly asks. At the sight of him, I’d nearly forgotten Kelly was with me, much less the fact that she’s been introduced to him.
“Yeah,” I say, my mouth dry.
“Is he one of the dancers?” she asks as we make our way toward him.
“No, just a doorman, or bouncer — I’m not sure what his job title is.”
“That’s too bad,” she says, before adding with a giggle, “I wonder how often he has to bounce rowdy women out of the club?”
The women who are talking to him now look like they may intentionally act up just to get carried out by Duke, but as soon as he sees me, he waves them off.
“Autumn.”
“Hi.” After looking at him for a moment and taking in little details like the fact that his hair is slightly shorter while his beard looks longer, I remember my manners. “You’ve met Kelly?”
“Hi.” Duke gives her a nod before returning his focus to me. “How’ve you been?”
“I’m okay.” Carrying on with life, though it suddenly seems to have no color, is what I could tell him.
“And your apartment?”
“It’s fine.”
“I’ll meet you inside,” Kelly tells me before she continues through the door.
“Okay.” I stay put, enjoying this stilted conversation more than I should.
“How have you been? Anything new?” I ask.
He shrugs and shakes his head.
We used to have great conversations when I was living with him. Long talks about growing up on the island, about jobs he’s had, about how I got into IT work, and when I started singing and playing guitar, but here we are now, less sociable than strangers. Stiff and uncomfortable.
“Adrian and Trevor are already in their dressing room,” he says. “They’ll want to see you after, though.”
“Are they leaving for the academy soon?”
He gives a single nod. “Next week.”
“Okay.” There are other things I could ask him, but I suppose it would only prolong the awkwardness, and it’s hard to think clearly when a big part of my attention is consumed by the sight and smell of him, of wanting to touch him… “I guess I’d better go find Kelly.”
There’s a pause, his gaze fixed on me, before he says, “Enjoy the show.”
I wait for a group to pass and then join the line behind them.
Brittany’s at the ticket counter, and lights up at the sight of me. “Autumn! How are you? I haven’t seen you for a while. Have you been busy playing shows?”
“Not yet. I have a couple coming up later this month, though.”
“That’s great,” she says. “Maybe I can come to one if they’re on my nights off.”
“I’d love to see you there,” I tell her, but my voice must lack the appropriate enthusiasm, because she pauses to look at me more closely before entering my admission fee into the system.
“Are you doing okay?” she asks, her eyes narrowed.
“I’m all right.” When she continues to look at me, not accepting my answer, I add, “I got attached when I shouldn’t have.”
“Ahh.” She nods knowingly. “Happens to the best of us. Over and over, in my case.”
I’ve been feeling really childish about my inability to let go, so I’m surprised to hear this from an older woman. “Really?”
Again, she nods. “I’m thinking about hanging it all up soon.”
“What?”
“Men just aren’t worth the trouble.” She presses a couple of keys on her console. “That’s in my case, though. You’re young. It’s easier to move on when you’re young, and easier to find someone new.”
I complete my end of the transaction, and walk down the hall to the showroom with her words echoing in my head. It doesn’t seem at all easy to move on, and what’s wrong with me that I have zero interest in finding another man to fill their spaces?
I should be going to other types of clubs, ones that aren’t filled with women, ones where I can possibly meet a man who might take my mind off of Duke, Garrett, Trevor, and Adrian.
I knew it was a potential danger to get attached to someone after having sex with them, but I had no idea it could happen after only a couple of nights. I guess I’m just not made for casual sex, and maybe deep inside I knew that, and that’s why I’d been waiting all this time to find someone special.
I screwed that up.
I’m still in a distracted daze as I look through the crowd, but eventually I notice Kelly, who’s standing near a table, waving at me. I remain distracted throughout the entire show, with the obvious exception of any time Trevor or Adrian are on stage. Then I’m noticing every detail, remembering how they touched me, remembering what they tasted like …
“Do you want another drink?” Kelly asks.
I’m surprised to look down and find an empty glass in front of me. “I’ll get refills,” I tell her. “Same thing for you?”