Total pages in book: 22
Estimated words: 21094 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 105(@200wpm)___ 84(@250wpm)___ 70(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 21094 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 105(@200wpm)___ 84(@250wpm)___ 70(@300wpm)
CHAPTER 4
JANE
It feels as if I’ve been holding my breath for the last seven years. Ever since he texted me the other day, I’ve been in a tizzy. I knew he’d talked about retiring, but I didn’t believe he’d do it. He called me an hour ago to let me know he was almost here, and I’ve played out every scenario. I’ve considered playing it cool by staying inside and hiding my emotions. I thought about leaving so he could come in and get settled on his own before I came home. But I knew I wouldn’t be able to do either of those things.
There’s no way I’ll be able to contain my emotions, and it would take a bomb to root me out of here right now. I stand on the porch and lean against the column as I wait for him to turn down our road.
When I see the headlights, I stand up straighter and stare without blinking, waiting to see if it’s Grant finally getting home.
When he slows down and pulls into the driveway, there’s no holding back.
I jump off the porch, bypassing the stairs, and run to the truck. He stops and opens the door, getting out as I get to where he’s parked.
We stand here, staring at each other, and his gaze travels the length of my body before finally stopping on my face. I’ve imagined this moment for years now and played it out in my head over and over, but I wasn’t prepared for the emotions that would hit me.
He has a few days of scruff on his chin, and he looks tired, but the fact that he’s standing in front of me instead of on the phone hits me hard. I put my hands to my face and burst into tears. Once the sobbing starts, I can’t stop it.
His hands go to my shoulders. “Jane, baby. What’s wrong? It’s okay… talk to me.”
The more Grant tries to soothe me, the harder I cry. He circles his arms around me and holds me against his body. My heart’s racing because I’ve wanted to be in his arms just like this since the day I met him. In all that time, I didn't think I’d be uncontrollably crying.
He gathers me in his arms, and when my feet come off the ground, I gasp. “Grant… what are you doing? I’m too big.”
He doesn’t put me down. If anything, he holds me tighter as he kicks his car door closed and then carries me toward the house, up the steps, and stops at the front door. “Get the door, honey.”
I reach over and open the door, and he walks into the house. He kicks the door closed and then carries me to the living room. Instead of setting me on the couch, he sits down, keeping me on his lap.
“Talk to me. Tell me why you’re crying.”
I sniffle and shake my head. “I’m sorry. I don’t know what came over me. I’ve thought about this moment forever, but I never thought I would fall apart. Here, I’ll get up.”
I start to move, but he holds on to me. “Stay.” As soon as he says it, he lifts his hands up, and I miss them instantly. “Sorry, you can get up.”
Unsure what to do, I stand up from his lap and move to sit next to him. An awkward silence comes over us, and I shake my head. It’s been less than five minutes and I’ve already messed up his homecoming.
Before I can apologize for my actions, he’s on his feet. “Uh, I’m going to go grab my bag.”
I jump up. “I’ll help you.”
He puts a hand out to stop me. “No, I got it. I’ll be right back.”
I watch him go, and panic starts to set in. I knew it would be weird, but I wasn’t expecting this. It’s like we’re strangers instead of husband and wife. And even though we haven’t been face to face, we do talk all the time on the phone. Even if it’s just about the house or other mundane things, we still talk.
When he walks in, he drops his bag next to the front door, and I walk up to him. “Can we start over?”
He wipes his hands down his thighs. “Yeah, sounds good.”
I hold my arms open. “Welcome home.”
He looks at me, and with a controlled smile, he nods his head. “Thank you.”
I let my arms drop awkwardly to my sides. This is not going well at all, and I’m not sure why. On the phone, he’s always affectionate and attentive, and he seems to be holding back now. I’m not sure what to make of it, but I’m not giving up. “Are you doing okay? How was your trip?”
He looks agitated as he runs his hands through his hair. “It was good. I’m a little tired.”