Total pages in book: 88
Estimated words: 85167 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 426(@200wpm)___ 341(@250wpm)___ 284(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 85167 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 426(@200wpm)___ 341(@250wpm)___ 284(@300wpm)
“By? Did something happen at work?”
“No, nothing like that. I’m, um, just...” He rolled his eyes to the ceiling. “...being stupid. Don’t mind me.”
Driver’s big palm rubbed Tam’s knee. “Tam.”
“Driver.” Sassy to the nth degree.
They smiled at each other. Then Tam started laughing and Driver did too and even though Tam still hadn’t worked up the courage to ask for what he wanted, it didn’t matter. There was understanding in Driver’s eyes. He was still caressing Tam’s knee and Tam’s heart was racing and nothing had ever felt as perfect as that moment. Everything was right. Being next to Driver was exactly where he was supposed to be.
“Come here.” Driver hooked him by the back of the head and pulled him into a kiss so sweet Tam’s toes curled.
Chapter Twenty-Four
Stage Left was packed that Friday night. Sweat and alcohol and perfume filled the muggy air as he pushed through the crowd. Part of Driver wanted to turn right around. Couldn’t they stay in the bubble they’d created at Tam’s place? Preferably naked. There was so much more to explore about each other. But they’d kept to themselves all week and people were starting to notice. Plus, Tam was too energetic, he’d wanted to go out and all his friends were busy. Driver wasn’t going to waste the night alone with Mikey. Not when he could be looking at Tam instead.
Maybe he could even score another dance.
For once, regular pop music poured from the speakers. There was even a small group in the center of the room grinding together between tables.
Driver held Tam’s hand and leaned over the bar. “Have I stepped into an alternate dimension?”
Brandon shot him the finger with a wide grin. “What are you doing here?”
Driver’s hand slid to the small of Tam’s back. “We’re celebrating.”
Brandon’s eyebrows shot into his hairline. “Really? That’s...wow. Congrats! You’re finally settling down. Gran will be thrilled.”
What the fuck? Driver’s laugh sounded nervous even to his own ears. “What the hell are you talking about?”
“You dating.” He waved a spoon between Driver and Tam.
His blood coursed fast like he was in a fight-or-flight situation. “It’s not like that.”
Brandon’s eyes softened as he looked at Tam.
“Right?” Driver asked Tam, desperate for confirmation. He didn’t like being cornered like this.
Tam’s expression hardened. The smile Tam aimed at Brandon was flat and lifeless, so unlike the Tam Driver knew—usually so full of life that he out-shined everyone around him.
“I’m just using him for sex.”
And fuck if that didn’t hurt like a knee to the balls. Which made absolutely no sense. Hadn’t he just said the same thing? He rubbed at his chest where Tam’s bite mark had bruised his skin a week ago and his heart twisted.
Did a part of him actually want to stay?
Driver swallowed the panic such a crazy idea caused and forced a smile he didn’t feel. No, it was impossible. This was exactly the reason he didn’t settle down. These feelings. These fears. He couldn’t handle them. He pushed the temporary insanity aside.
To Brandon, he said, “See?”
His friend’s jaw popped as if he were holding back a lecture, which Driver would surely hear later, once they were alone. Not a minute before, Tam had glowed like a star, now he looked like he wanted to be anywhere else with anyone else.
Driver didn’t know how to be the guy Tam deserved. He couldn’t be that guy.
He couldn’t be tied down, stuck in one place watching everyone he loved leave him. He couldn’t face each day remembering the loss he’d already endured. The guilt would eat him alive.
“Hey, since you’re here do you mind helping out until the rush dies down? I’m getting slammed and Rick is off tonight.” Brandon was clearly trying to smooth things over, and Driver grabbed on to the rope like the lifeline it was.
“Sure.” He turned to Tam. “You mind?”
“No, go ahead.”
As Driver maneuvered behind the bar Brandon asked, “So what are you celebrating?”
“Nothing, it was just a good day.” Tam’s excitement had disappeared, his voice level.
Brandon nodded like he understood, then slapped the bar. “Right. Well, what’ll ya have?”
“I got it,” Driver said. No one made Tam’s signature drink except him.
“I’ll have a vodka and soda,” Tam said to Brandon.
Driver’s fingers tightened around the bottle in his hand. Okay, so that’s how it was? Fine. Without a word, he headed toward the other end of the bar to serve the couple waving him down.
This was good.
He and Tam had gotten too close too fast and Driver couldn’t afford to let their—whatever it was—get serious. If that meant it was over, he’d just have to deal. Even if the very thought of not being with Tam again made him want to carve his own heart out.
Relationships just weren’t part of the life he’d built.
* * *
“I swear that boy is an idiot,” Brandon said as he slid Tam’s drink onto the bar.