Total pages in book: 213
Estimated words: 201920 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 1010(@200wpm)___ 808(@250wpm)___ 673(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 201920 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 1010(@200wpm)___ 808(@250wpm)___ 673(@300wpm)
I set the heavy bottle back down in her bag. “I don’t know,” I tell her, still feeling uneasy.
“Hey, relax,” Sam says and then sits in the center of my bed. It creaks under her weight. “As far as your mom knows, we’re having a sleepover and tomorrow morning when she comes home, we’ll be right here.” She pats the bed and then grips my shoulders. “Tonight, we’re going to go to Mike’s house,” she says and tilts her head as she emphasizes my crush’s name with her broad, pearly white grin. “And we’re going to be chill and cool and he’s going to get to know you better.”
“Maybe we can use the wine to play spin the bottle?” I say as the idea of sitting in Mike’s basement and flirting makes me feel giddier than anything else has tonight.
Her smile widens and her eyes brighten. “Fucking fantastic idea,” she squeals. “This is why I love you,” she adds and then jumps off the bed.
“It’s not because we’ve been friends forever?” I joke back with her.
“Best friends for life!” she answers and then twirls her long, dark brown hair around her finger. “Seriously, tonight is going to be amazing,” she says with so much excitement and happiness, it’s contagious.
“Can I ask you something?” I blurt out, cutting through the happiness yet again.
“Anything,” Sam says instantly, looking right at me and giving me her full attention.
“Does it make me a whore if I want to have sex?” I say. “Like, even if I don’t really want to be with Mike, but I just want to know what it’s like?”
“Pretty sure that’s normal, babe,” she says with a smile. “If not, I’m fucked.”
DEAN
My uncle’s truck rumbles to a stop in front of my stepfather’s house. It’s the corner lot on the street, a two-story colonial with blue shutters and a porch swing right out front.
It only took my dad’s death for my mother to have the house of her dreams. She even got her white picket fence.
“I don’t see the point,” I say to my uncle as I stare at the front door and then the driveway. “Both their cars are here.” I turn to look at Uncle Rob as I speak. “If they don’t want me, what’s the point of even going in there?”
“You need to face the music, kid.” He says it like that’s why I don’t want to go in there. My eyes narrow and I feel my forehead pinch.
“You don’t get it. It’s not just about today or yesterday. It’s every day. Every single day I have to live in a house where I’m hated.”
“Knock it off, Dean,” my uncle says as though what I’m saying has no weight to it.
It’s quiet for a long time, but my heart’s pounding and all I can hear is the blood rushing in my ears. I want to get it all out. Uncle Rob’s the only one who listens to me. He’s the only one who gives a shit.
“Ever since Dad died,” I say, and it hurts to say the words out loud as I continue, “she doesn’t want me anymore.”
“That’s not true—” he starts to say but I raise my voice and cut him off.
“It is true!” My eyes sting and I hate it. I hate everything. I hate her the most.
“You’re just angry,” Uncle Rob says although he twists his hands on the leather steering wheel and looks out the window like he’s judging my words. “Why can’t you just be like Jack’s kid?” he asks me. Jack is his friend who has two sons; one’s a kid my age. “Go out and have fun. Sneak a beer, kiss a girl. Why do you have to run your mouth and make a scene?”
“It’s easy for you to say,” I mumble under my breath. I was going to go out with Jack’s kid to a party tonight. I was actually looking forward to meeting Mike and a few of the guys he knows. It’s been lonely since Dad died. I’m desperate enough to admit that and I finally said yeah, I’d go out. No fucking way that’s happening now.
Maybe my uncle’s right and that’s where I should be tonight. Instead this is what I’ve got to look forward to.
“She didn’t even cry at his funeral.” My words come out hollow, matching how my chest feels. “She was already with him.” I look him in the eye. “He slept over when Dad was in the hospital.”
Uncle Rob is my mother’s brother. I know he’d never say a bad word about her, but he can’t deny the truth. The minute my dad got sick, my mother started counting how much she’d get from the insurance policy. Richard came next. Just like that, she moved on and didn’t look back. Leaving me behind and alone when my dad died. She wasn’t there with me in the hospital room and she sure as hell wasn’t there after. I can’t forgive her.