Total pages in book: 213
Estimated words: 201920 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 1010(@200wpm)___ 808(@250wpm)___ 673(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 201920 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 1010(@200wpm)___ 808(@250wpm)___ 673(@300wpm)
“Are you thinking of leaving me?” he finally asks and I reach up to take his hand in mine.
“No,” I tell him, practically rolling my eyes and getting more comfortable in the corner of my sofa.
“Good,” he says although he still eyes me curiously.
“If I hadn’t come to your place, would you have let me leave you?” I don’t know why I feel so compelled to ask in this moment. Maybe I already know the truth and I just want to see if he’ll tell me or not.
His dark eyes seem to get darker, although his voice stays even as he answers me, “I would have tried.”
I chew the inside of my cheek and look away at his response.
“Why does that disappoint you?”
“Can’t you feel it?” I barely whisper the words. He makes me feel weak and foolish. But admitting there’s something undeniable that pulls you to someone like it does no one else isn’t weak at all. It takes every bit of strength in me.
Daniel’s eyes leave mine for a moment and I begin to doubt myself. I can barely swallow until he says, “I said I would try. I didn’t say I was capable.”
My eyes close and I wish I could will all of this overwhelming emotion away. But that’s what Daniel’s always done to me. Overwhelmed me.
“I’ll keep you safe. Always.”
My heart soars and plummets with his words. That’s how it feels and the relief on my lips falls with it.
“I just know … your job … is dangerous.” I hate how my throat feels tight as I speak. “I knew what I was getting into. It’s different when you wait at home alone wondering …”
“But I’m a dangerous man, Addison. I know what I’m doing.”
I search his dark eyes for reassurance and it’s there, but still I can’t help adding, “Don’t die. Everyone I love dies.”
“What if it’s more like anyone who loves you dies?” he questions and it doesn’t help me feel any better at all. He shrugs and points out, “Then I’m dying anyway, so you might as well love me back.”
Although I realize the words were spoken in a lighthearted way, the acknowledgement is there. That there’s something more between us and we both feel it. We both recognize it for what it is. I don’t dare to speak it again. I’m too caught up in those flutters in my chest. The ones that hurt in the best of ways. My eyes start to gloss over and I shove all the emotion away.
“Just be safe, my dangerous sex god.” My voice is playful and nonchalant as I reach for the remote, ending the conversation. It’s too much, too soon. But it feels like everything that’s always been missing. It feels right. It feels like home. And I’m so afraid to lose it.
Daniel chuckles and leans down to cup my cheek and plant a soft kiss in my hair. “I’ll be back as soon as I can,” he whispers and it tickles me enough to make me pull away and snatch a kiss from his lips myself.
It’s only been weeks, but this is everything I’ve ever wished for.
As the door clicks shut, leaving me alone in my apartment, I remember a certain saying.
Be careful what you wish for.
CHAPTER 20
Daniel
Five years ago
I knew something was off when I walked in at 4 a.m. and the dining room light was on. The yellow glow carries into the kitchen and I follow it to see Tyler at the end of the large table, head in his hand staring at the screen to his laptop.
I expect to hear something, maybe see him watching a video. But the screen has gone black and that’s when I see his expression. Defeated and exhausted.
“You still up?” I ask him, which is a stupid question. It gets his attention though, although his exhaustion makes him blink several times before he can answer me. It’s then that I see his eyes are puffy, not with sleep, but with something else.
“Yeah, couldn’t sleep,” he answers and then visibly swallows as he closes the laptop.
My jacket rustles as I slip it off and hang it over the chair in front of me. I still feel like an asshole for snapping at him the other day. Of everyone living under this roof, Tyler’s the last person who needs my shit. “Everything alright?”
He sits back and lets out a heavy breath, but instead of answering verbally, he only shakes his head no.
“You want to talk about it?” I ask as I grip the back of the chair and prepare myself for the answer I know is coming. Addison isn’t here and Tyler can’t sleep. She left him.
“You were right,” Tyler says and then turns away from me.
“I was an asshole who was trying to be an asshole. I’m never right. You know that?”