Total pages in book: 210
Estimated words: 203847 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 1019(@200wpm)___ 815(@250wpm)___ 679(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 203847 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 1019(@200wpm)___ 815(@250wpm)___ 679(@300wpm)
Every second of every day. He’ll be there. Always.
“Fucking hell,” he groans. “By the look on your face, you’d think you didn’t want me to be anywhere near you.”
I dive my hands into my hair. Where are my words? Hello, brain-to-mouth filter? Now would be a great time to fuck off.
“And now I’m thinking I could be right.”
“No!” I finally blurt. I look up at him and hate what I see in his eyes. There’s a vulnerability there. Hurt. Something that shouldn’t be there. “That’s not the problem. The problem is that I do want you there. All the time. But that isn’t a good idea.”
He drops his head back. “One step forward, two steps back.”
“Jeez, Ty!” I stand and walk to the window. “We’ve been dating for, like, ten days.”
“And fucking for weeks.”
I close my eyes briefly. “Apparently fucking and dating are one and the same for you.”
“They are where you’re concerned.”
Because our relationship is primarily sex, I want to say. Because it follows your addiction with barely any regard for my own.
“I’m not having this conversation. I’m not going to argue about this. It’s ridiculous.” I walk into his room and stuff my feet into my boots. I grab my purse and head toward the door.
“What is it with you and running away?”
“I’m not running away. I’m walking away from a situation I’m not prepared to deal with right now. Like an adult.” I put my hand on the door.
“No, you’re running. Every time I talk about us, you turn around and you run away from me. Ten minutes ago, you were moaning my fucking name.”
“This is me!” I yell. “Okay? This. Is. Me. If you stopped for two seconds and really thought about it, you’d see it. You think I don’t want to be around you or be in a serious relationship with you, but you couldn’t be further from the truth.”
I press my fingers to my temples and fight the sting of tears.
“I want to be around you, Tyler. All the fucking time, I want you next to me because I am so goddamn addicted to you that it hurts when you’re not there!”
“Then let me be there!”
“It isn’t that simple! I wish it were, but shit, it isn’t. Just like your addiction is about you, mine is about me, okay? If I want to keep any semblance of myself, I need time away from you. Otherwise, you will consume me and I won’t even be the person you wanted at the start.”
Nothing. No words. No reply. No fight back.
I turn the door handle and pull it open.
“There isn’t a single day I can think of where I won’t want you. Even when you’re walking away from me, I want you. And not to fuck you. Not for your body. I want you. Because I hurt when you’re not there, too. I want you always. I’m as addicted as you are.” His words fill the silence.
“You’re not allowed to be addicted to me,” I whisper as he steps up to me and envelopes me in his arms.
He pushes the door shut with his fingertips. “I’ve never been very good at doing what I’m told,” he says softly into my hair. “Because tell me not to do something and you bet your hot arse I’m going to do it.”
“Why do I believe you?” A smile twitches my lips despite the tears rolling down my cheeks.
He smiles against my temple. “Getting addicted to you was never a choice. It was always inevitable. I couldn’t resist you if I tried, baby girl. You’re my kryptonite.”
I drop my purse and wrap my arms around his waist tighter than I ever have. Because the escape his touch gives me anchors me at the same time. It’s contradictory, hot and cold, ice and fire, chalk and cheese. Everything about my growing addiction to this gorgeous man is a big fucking ping-pong game.
“What are you doing later?”
“Nothing. Why?” I answer.
“I have another shoot. Want to come with me?”
I pull back and look at him. “After last time? Really?”
A heart-thumping smile stretches across his face. “It’s not that kind of shoot. I promise. You won’t want to leave.”
I don’t want to leave.
Ever.
There are little girls dancing around in front of me in the most beautiful frilly dresses. They’re accompanied by the cutest little boys in suits, who are holding flowers and teddy bears and lollipops for their “dates.”
They’re giggling at each other. The girls are blushing. The little boys are bowing. They’re all jumping around and smiling the most adorable smiles… And laughing at the funny man behind the camera.
He’s holding my attention as much as the cuties he’s taking photos of. He’s making funny faces and singing silly songs—I have no doubt that he knows that he looks like a total idiot.
“Stefanie!” Tyler calls the name of a little blond girl. “Why aren’t you singing?”