Total pages in book: 218
Estimated words: 209489 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 1047(@200wpm)___ 838(@250wpm)___ 698(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 209489 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 1047(@200wpm)___ 838(@250wpm)___ 698(@300wpm)
I already knew he was being ornery, but was he really just trying to mess with me?
Did he… want me to mess with him back?
He was so complicated.
“You know,” I said cautiously, trying to read him, “I think I liked you more when you grunted at me all the time.”
He didn’t miss a beat. “And I liked you when you didn’t talk back. What happened to her?”
Fucker. I smiled at him. “She was just being nice because she was scared you or someone else would kill her if you didn’t get better.”
A little huff snuck out of his nose.
I shrugged. “It’s true. I don’t want to die.”
“You keep saying that.”
“I’ve got a few things I want to do before I do,” I told him.
I was giving the premade chili a stir when he spoke up again. “Well? What things?”
He wanted to know? I peeked at him, more shocked over that than I probably was when he’d given me his name. “It isn’t like they’re five-year goals or anything. Just random stuff.”
Out of the corner of my eye, The Defender tilted his head to the side, saying everything with just that little gesture.
I added some salt to the pot, trying not to feel uncomfortable. Or vulnerable. “Just… stuff that will probably sound dumb to you. You can just make fun of me now and save me my breath.”
He didn’t say anything for so long, I looked at him.
Alexander looked stunned. “I wouldn’t make fun of your dreams.”
It was my turn to tip my head to the side, like come on. “You make fun of everything else. Why are you making that face? You do. I know I’m more your frenemy than your friend, and that’s okay, even if I don’t get why I get on your nerves so much. But I meant what I told you when I said we should be friends. I want to be yours, even if you get on my nerves when you’re rude.”
His face….
“It’s okay, you’re not the first person to ever not like me. There was always at least one person at every school I ever went to that wanted to pick on me for no reason, and at least you tell me things to my face instead of behind my back. And you saved my life. It’s okay.”
His mouth moved. “I….” His jaw went hard, and his eyes glowed for a moment. “I wouldn’t make fun of the things you want to do with your life, Gracie. I’m… I’m only messing with you.”
I narrowed my eyes, not trusting him.
“I am,” he insisted so seriously, I couldn’t help but believe him.
But it still felt like too much. Telling him my name or what my grandparents called me was one thing, but sharing other stuff? Being vulnerable was fucking hard. I eyed him again.
His features were blank, but there was something in his eyes that seemed a little different.
I sighed. “I don’t know, okay? Not really. What’s the point in planning if I didn’t know whether I’d ever have to up and leave unexpectedly? There are things I’d like to see with my own eyes. I’d like to do some of the things I’ve seen people do on television. Little stuff, you know? I’ve always wanted to go skydiving or wear one of those squirrel suits and go paragliding. But at the same time, honestly, little things would be great. I’d like to get a pet. I’ve always wanted an Oriental Shorthair cat, or a Peterbald. I’d love a dog too. Any dog, but I’d really love a corgi or a dachshund since they have little legs like me.” I gave the pot another stir, ignoring the tightness in my chest. “Sex. A relationship. I’ve probably thought about that the most, honestly.”
I’d just said “sex” in front of him of all people.
And I’d also done more than pee in front of him. We were way past that point. Down the block, around the corner, and in a totally different neighborhood. He was an adult. I was an adult. We both damn well knew what sex was.
I peeked at him to find him leaning against the counter again, arms still crossed, biceps bulging beneath the hoodie. He didn’t seem interested, but I could tell he was listening.
“Anyway, I want what everyone else wants. Love, happiness, traveling. Not to be alone.” I snorted, thinking about how I wanted my job back too. “It’s not that original. I don’t want to climb Mt. Everest. But when you’re too busy hiding, you don’t really have that many options. You can’t really get to know people too well because it’s too hard to lie all the time.”
Oh boy, that was more than I’d ever told anyone, even my grandparents. At some point, when I started talking about my hopes and dreams as a teenager, they had started making these sympathetic faces that took me a while to process. They had known what my future would hold, and that was none of what I used to go on about.