What I Should’ve Said Read Online Max Monroe

Categories Genre: Alpha Male, Angst, Contemporary Tags Authors:
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Total pages in book: 106
Estimated words: 101398 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 507(@200wpm)___ 406(@250wpm)___ 338(@300wpm)
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Her voice is small, but the effect is like a gunshot, I’m so surprised to hear it.

“You’re…gonna…be…okay…Daddy.”

“Summer? Summer baby, you’re awake?” I ask frantically, kissing her hand and her cheek and her forehead. She coughs and her eyes struggle to make the effort to blink, but the corners of her mouth still lift a little into her beautiful, amazing smile.

“Why…are…you…yelling?”

I laugh. “I’m sorry. I’m sorry, Sum. I just thought…”

“I’m…sleepy…Daddy,” she says, every word a struggle.

“I know, baby. I know you’re tired.” My face crumples, tears falling as silently as I can manage down my face. “You’ve been so strong.” My throat feels like it’s closing. “But it’s okay now. You don’t have to be strong anymore. I’ll be okay.”

“I…know…Daddy…”

I swipe at the tears with the back of my hand and try to smile down at her. “You do?”

“You…have…Norah,” she says and then coughs again, just barely catching her breath. “She…makes…everything…okay.”

I nod. Yeah, my girl and I fell hard, just as I suspected we would. The only problem is that I don’t make everything okay for Norah. She deserves to be happy and safe and with someone she can trust.

“Yeah, baby. She does.”

“I…want…to…see…her.”

“Okay,” I agree without hesitation, knowing Norah would want to see her too.

“Charlie!” I call out, and it’s only five seconds before she’s popping her head into the room and coming to take my place. I don’t know how she knows, but I don’t even have to ask her to sit with Summer for her to understand that’s what I want. With another kiss or two or three to my daughter’s precious face, I leave the bedroom and head for the kitchen to find my phone.

Breezy is there again, and I’m almost delirious enough to believe the whole police station thing was a fever dream and Norah is still asleep in my bed.

“You okay, Ben?” Breezy asks, jumping up from her chair when I turn from side to side, trying to figure out what the hell I was doing.

“I…” I shake my head. “Summer wants to see Norah. I was looking for my phone, but I don’t know where it is.”

“I’ll call her. I have her number,” Breezy offers straightaway.

“That’s good.” I nod. Nod again. “Probably better anyway.” I don’t even know if Norah wants to talk to me at this point. “Tell her…if she needs me to leave, I can.”

“Bennett,” Breezy replies, her intonation meant to chastise me with just my name.

I wave her off. “No, Breeze. I… Just let her know. Whatever she wants. But…she should come soon.”

Breezy’s mouth is a firm line of everything I’m feeling inside.

The seasons are changing, and our beautiful Summer is almost gone.

Norah

Breezy’s call was simple and to the point—I should come now.

Josie is the only reason I’m even wearing shoes, I rushed out the door so fast. Truth be told, I’ve been sick to my stomach since Bennett walked out of the police station yesterday afternoon.

The look in his eyes as he professed his supposed sins was a window into the bleak depths of his suffering soul. Not only with Summer, but with the way he views himself and all the things he’s worthy of.

I don’t mind that he called on me at the station, and I don’t mind that he did it at the expense of my free will. It felt like the least I could do with all the strife I’ve brought on him since arriving, and beyond that, it was for the very best of reasons.

How, I wonder, would he expect me to love a man who could put a woman he’s known for a short time over the daughter he’s spent her whole life fighting for? Because, for as much as I was the victim of his actions, I was also the victor.

Bennett Bishop is the kind of man you search your whole life for. The kind of man most women never find.

I can’t tell you how many times over the past twenty-four hours I’ve stopped myself from going to him. From showing up at his house and telling him all the things he needs to hear.

And I’ve cried to Josie about a million times since yesterday, warring with myself over what to do, but I know now isn’t the time to invalidate Bennett’s feelings. He feels he committed a transgression against me. To forgive him while he’s in the throes of his daughter’s last moments on this earth would be written off as an act of pity or mercy, and I refuse to have him believe it’s either.

So, I’m here. Silently. Wishing I could reach out and hug him and find a way to make it okay.

But losing a child is the kind of thing you can’t fix.

Bennett’s bedroom door is closed as I walk carefully down the hallway toward his daughter’s room. And when I enter the room, only Charlie and Summer are inside.



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