Total pages in book: 112
Estimated words: 108124 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 541(@200wpm)___ 432(@250wpm)___ 360(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 108124 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 541(@200wpm)___ 432(@250wpm)___ 360(@300wpm)
This wasn’t how everything was supposed to go down. I wasn’t supposed to care so damn much about my estranged brother. But something had changed with Tanner. And I couldn’t ignore it. Knowing that he genuinely seemed to regret his actions over the years made it much harder to disregard his feelings, like I’d planned. Now I was second-guessing everything. Hadn’t he lost enough when his career ended? Didn’t he deserve a chance to have his family back? The problem was, his family now also felt like my family. And I didn’t want to give up Presley and Alex. How do you choose between the woman of your dreams and your brother? Is blood automatically thicker than water? I honestly didn’t have the answer, but losing either of them didn’t seem like an option.
Presley was dead set against Tanner ever finding out about us, and I was starting to agree with her, even if I’d been adamant about telling him the truth just a day ago. If he could never find out, how the hell did Presley and I stand a chance? We couldn’t hide forever. My stomach churned. It seemed more and more like this decision was being made for us. I just couldn’t accept it.
There was a knock at the door.
I opened to find Presley standing there in a short, flowery dress and denim jacket. Her eyes were filled with worry, and despite all of this guilt, I wanted nothing more than to take her on this damn hotel room bed so we could drown our sorrows in each other.
“Why have you been avoiding me all day?” she asked as she stepped into the room.
“I’m sorry.”
Her chest heaved. “I know you and Tanner talked this morning.”
“Yeah. That’s why I left. It shook me.”
She nodded, looking down at her feet. “He told me he let you know he plans to try to get me back.”
I exhaled. “I’m glad you convinced me not to tell him about us. I don’t know what I was thinking. Now I realize it would devastate him.” Fighting the urge to pull her into my arms, I looked her up and down. “What else did he say to you?”
“He told me he wants to earn my trust back. He thinks we can get back together once that happens. He has no clue how complicated this situation is.”
Jealousy burned through my body. I looked up at the ceiling and shook my head. “Can I ask you something?”
“Of course.”
“Would you consider taking him back if you and I had never gotten together?”
She paused. “I honestly don’t think so. But it’s hard to say, given that I would probably be a different person altogether right now if we hadn’t happened. But we did happen. I know now that I deserve better. And the way you treat me is the way I want to be treated. I’ve never wanted anyone like I want you, Levi. I can’t just forget about us. At the same time, I don’t want him to find out.” Her voice cracked. “It’s messed up.”
While I could tell Presley believed what she’d just told me, it was possible she was confused.
“How do you know your feelings for me are the real deal?” I asked.
Her eyes narrowed. “What do you mean? When you know, you just…know.”
“There’s no doubt we’re addicted to each other sexually, but what if this is just a strong physical attraction that’s clouding your judgment?”
Her voice grew louder. “Because I think about you all of the time, even when you’re not physically with me, and because you make me happy. I’m not going to deny that I’m extremely physically attracted to you. That is a big part of it. But what we have is so much more than sex.”
“It means more to me, too,” I whispered.
“You make me feel safe, Levi—in a way no one else ever has, certainly not Tanner.”
I finally drew her into my arms and held her tight. But the longer I held her, the deeper the seeds of doubt seemed to grow.
Pulling back to look at her, I said, “Even if by some stretch of the imagination we could keep being together a secret, Tanner isn’t the only complication. Our relationship has worked thus far because I’m here for you day in and day out, but soon it won’t be anything like that. We’d be living apart for a big chunk of the year, and that’s the opposite of what you need to continue to feel safe with me. It’s unstable. Things are about to change in a big way. And I’m starting to doubt whether I’m really what’s best for you and Alex.”
Presley closed her eyes, as if my words pained her. When she opened them, she said, “You just told me every reason we shouldn’t be together, Levi, and yet I’m still standing here in front of you, wanting you more than anything else. That’s not going to change.” She placed her hands around my face. “I’m scared to lose you.”