Total pages in book: 121
Estimated words: 117820 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 589(@200wpm)___ 471(@250wpm)___ 393(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 117820 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 589(@200wpm)___ 471(@250wpm)___ 393(@300wpm)
“Please try to understand,” I beg, backing up against a wall when Grandpa flexes his belt between his hands. “Please… please… PLEASE!” His belt hits the side of my thigh making me scream and drop onto my hands and knees. “I’m sorry. I’m so sorry!”
He hits me again, this time on my back and Mee-maw stands and watches.
“PLEASE STOP!” I arch when he hits me again. God it burns and bruises. I’ve never felt pain like this. I thought Mee-maw’s slipper was bad, but I didn’t know the full extent of the kind of pain I could feel.
“WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU THINK YOU’RE DOING?” Matthew’s voice is like cool water on lava. He dives at our grandpa and wrestles the belt from his hands. “You’re sick! Both of you are fucking sick!”
“How dare you speak to me like that, boy?” Grandpa hisses, angrier than I’ve ever seen him. They square up to each other as Poppy helps me off the floor, whispering soothing words as I sob uncontrollably. My body hurts so bad. My skin is on fire.
“Swing for me, Grandpa, please give me an excuse to knock your frail ass down. Beating on a girl half your size and for shit you did when you were a teen,” Matthew snarls and Grandpa at least has the gall to look slightly ashamed.
Mee-maw clutches her chest and her rosary beads. “Oh my, the heavens sent me such plagued children.”
“Did you ever think that you’re the problem?” I ask her, hiccupping slightly. “Did you ever stop to think the damage you’ve caused us all by beating us and treating us the way you have?”
“I have punished you accordingly for your sins. No worse than my mother punished me as a child and I turned out just fine!”
Well that self-proclamation is entirely laughable, if I wasn’t so distraught.
“I need to sit down,” Grandpa whispers and moves to my bed. He sits on the mattress side and he too clutches his chest.
Is there no end to their mind games?
“You didn’t turn out fine,” I say to her, clinging to Poppy for support. “You’re a controlling, horrible woman.”
She looks hurt. “I only want what’s best for you.”
“I need some water,” Grandpa rasps, flexing his left arm.
Matthew loses his rage and moves to the old man’s side. “Are you okay?”
“No,” Grandpa hisses and everybody goes quiet. For a moment his eyes go glassy as he stares ahead. He lets out a horrifying choke and falls onto his side on the floor.
“Oh my God,” Poppy whispers and pulls out her phone. I’m too shocked to move. I thought he was laying it on heavy like Mee-maw does. “I’ll call an ambulance.”
Mee-maw screams and rushes to her husband’s side, shoving Matthew out of the way. She clasps the old man’s hand. “Don’t you leave me now, Regen. You hear me? Don’t you dare leave me now.”
“My chest,” he chokes, struggling for breath.
I press my hand against it, crouching beside him. I can feel it racing under my palm. Its rhythm is erratic.
“DON’T YOU TOUCH HIM!” Mee-maw shrieks at me, shoving me so hard I fall onto my sore rear. “You did this! YOU!”
26 years old
“You ain’t goin’ nowhere till we’ve had us some lunch,” Felicia admonishes, and West Jessop tosses me his helmet.
“I’ve got a really long drive,” I utter, feeling bad when her eyes flash with hurt. “But lunch would actually be great right now.”
I pull on his helmet and follow him to his bike.
“You know I got you,” Mr. Jessop says softly, lifting his leg over his huge Harley and motioning for me to do the same.
“Go on now,” Felicia insists and I climb on behind him.
“Where are we going?” I ask though it sounds muffled.
“To eat, like I said.”
“And to find out why the hell you ran away all those years ago,” West adds and shoots forward before I can climb off and run again.
15 years old
Mee-maw hasn’t spoken to me since Grandpa died a week ago. Though she held my hand at the funeral today as she wept at his graveside. I shed a few tears too. He was my grandfather after all and I loved him, I still love him.
Matthew hasn’t taken it so well, he blames himself, but Mee-maw blames me. Matthew is male, he can do no wrong. I’m starting to see this more and more the older I get.
I’d like to say it’s nobody’s fault what happened but what if Grandpa dying was God’s way of punishing me for trying to take my own life? What if Kane Jessop never should have saved me and death needed to take a payment for his loss of my soul?
The service was beautiful, everybody in town attended. The wake was even more so. There’s so much food, so many well-wishers and people who seem to genuinely care.