Total pages in book: 166
Estimated words: 157273 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 786(@200wpm)___ 629(@250wpm)___ 524(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 157273 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 786(@200wpm)___ 629(@250wpm)___ 524(@300wpm)
She promptly snuggled back against me, stole half my pillow, and pushed her incredible ass right against my dick as she got comfortable.
“What do you want to do about Eva?” I asked, resting my hand on her bare hip.
“Besides throttle her?” She sighed. “Once it’s announced, it takes an act of God to change Vasily’s mind. I’m not sure there’s anything to do besides never speak to her again, which also is just . . . unconscionable.”
“Yeah, I don’t know if I could cut Gavin or Caroline off either.” I stroked her skin absentmindedly. “You could leave the Company.”
“You could leave the Coast Guard,” she retorted.
“Point taken.” I fought a smile. “But I move duty stations and still do the same thing. You can dance anywhere in the world. Are you still under contract?”
“For another month,” she answered. “August fifteenth.”
“Day of the Classic.” It was coming up quickly.
She nodded. “I sat in the dark for two days, trying to decide if I should change my name and move to another country, or metaphorically beat the shit out of my sister.”
“And what did you decide?”
“I want my role back.” She shifted.
“Then be an act of God.” I groaned. “And stop wiggling your ass or all my honorable intentions will disappear.”
“As I recall, you did some very dishonorable things to me a few days ago.”
“That’s not helping.” I kissed the top of her head, burying my nose in her hair and breathing in the unique floral scent that had haunted me for over a decade. “Go to sleep.”
“You should put Sitka at the top of your list.”
“One, Caroline isn’t ready for me to go. Two, it puts me on the other side of the whole fucking country from the only person I’d like to be close to, who—in case you missed it—is you. And three, go to sleep.” I draped my arm over her waist.
She tensed for a second, then burrowed closer, which I didn’t mind in the least. “I didn’t mean it. When I said we meant nothing, I didn’t mean it. All I could think for those hours was that you were out in that storm and I’d . . .”
“I know. I knew it when you said it.” I kissed the spot behind her ear. “And I have a hundred-percent return rate when it comes to storms.”
She turned in my arms and looked at me. “I don’t like it when people get too close,” she whispered.
“Also something I know.” I stroked her hip. “In fact, I’ve known that for about eleven years. And while it’s probably one of your most frustrating qualities, I have to admit you keep it interesting. And in your defense, you warned me from the get-go.” Guess we weren’t sleeping, but I couldn’t bring myself to care, not when I finally had her in my bed. “But you could do us both a favor and stop fighting it.”
Her mouth opened like she wanted to say something, and she struggled for a few seconds. “Would you really take me any way you can get me?”
I was instantly, fully awake. “Yes.”
“What if there’s a way for this to be real but . . . safe.” She tucked her hands against my chest.
Holy shit. Was this actually happening?
“It’s already real. What do you need to feel safe?” I grazed my hand up her back.
She swallowed hard. “It has to be easy. Simple. No one gets hurt.”
“Okay.” I was already going to hurt, but as long as she escaped unscathed, I’d give her whatever she wanted. “No mess,” I guessed.
She nodded. “Everything in my life is in upheaval, and I need you not to be.” She brought her hands up beneath her chin. “And I know that’s not fair—”
“Any way I can get you,” I reminded her, and guilt started gnawing on the edges of my stomach. There was so much history between us.
“Even if it’s only until I go back to New York?” She tensed.
Fuck. “You only want this to last for five weeks?” But hadn’t that always been my plan? To use the summer to bring some life back into her eyes? Then why did it feel like having a section of my heart carved out?
“I can only have this for five weeks,” she clarified. “I have to be fully focused once I go back. I’ll be fighting for my place in the Company, and—”
Make it easy for her.
“I get it.” I brushed her hair back from her face, and the guilt bit harder. This was a taste of everything I’d ever wanted, and talking about the past would risk everything, but I had to. I couldn’t tell her this was real and not be real. “We should talk about the way I left you, and if you don’t forgive me—”
“Don’t.” She shook her head quickly and cupped the side of my face. “I forgave you the second you told me you were at the performance. We were kids and we’ve both made mistakes, Hudson.”