Total pages in book: 116
Estimated words: 111520 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 558(@200wpm)___ 446(@250wpm)___ 372(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 111520 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 558(@200wpm)___ 446(@250wpm)___ 372(@300wpm)
I turned to look at the nightstand on my side of the bed and stilled at the sight of a small bottle of chocolate milk sitting there.
It was open and empty.
I vaguely remembered Vaughn stopping at a gas station shortly before we’d gotten to the house, but I hadn’t noticed him buying the milk.
And when had I drunk it?
I couldn’t remember that.
God, what was wrong with me? Why did everything seem so muddled in my head?
I glanced at Vaughn again. I wanted to ask him if things would ever just go back to the way they’d been before those men had grabbed me. I hadn’t exactly been living a dream life but considering all that had happened and compared to what I was going through now, I might as well have been on top of the world.
I missed Dante.
And Magnus.
And Matty.
I felt tears threaten but refused to let them fall. My eyes hurt so bad from all the crying that if I shed even one more tear, I’d probably never be able to close my eyes again.
I wondered if Vaughn would let me call Dante again in the morning. My brother had to be going crazy with worry and Magnus would be doing his best to keep Dante calm. Vaughn shifted slightly but it wasn’t until he whispered, “I’m sorry, Aleks” that I turned to look at him, fully expecting him to be watching me.
But he was still asleep.
Which meant… God, was he dreaming about me?
He’d turned his head so one side was pressed against the headboard and he was facing in my direction. My eyes fell to his mouth, which was slightly open.
Why was he even in bed with me again? Had I been having bad dreams again? Before the one that had woken me up?
“Aleks…”
He said my name on a soft sigh and my body responded to it. I didn’t really know what was happening, but I couldn’t say it was a bad feeling exactly. But I didn’t like how my lower half was reacting. My penis was tightening uncomfortably in my pants. It wasn’t the first time it had happened, but it was the first time the sensation kept getting stronger and the urge to touch myself started filtering through my head.
I wasn’t completely naïve – I knew what it meant when that part of a man’s body hardened. But I knew also that that kind of a reaction usually meant I would be the one to pay for it. I didn’t know what it meant that I was the one experiencing that particular thing. I did know it had only ever happened around Vaughn, though.
After Dante had gotten me back to Seattle, he’d explained to me that he and Magnus planned to spend the rest of their lives together, just like Mama and Papa. I’d known my brother liked both boys and girls when we’d been younger, and it hadn’t ever bothered me, but admittedly, after all the things that had been done to me, I couldn’t imagine why my brother liked being with another man.
Maybe it didn’t work the same when two people loved each other?
I’d never been brave enough to ask Dante, because then I would have had to answer questions. I knew that he knew what had happened to me but that didn’t mean I wanted to talk about it in detail.
Besides, not everybody had to want that kind of thing, right? Brian and Father and all the other men had used their bodies to hurt mine, so any man who wanted to be with me like that again would just do the same, wouldn’t they?
Did Vaughn want me like that?
If he did, would he care that I didn’t want it? Would he hurt me anyway?
My head began to hurt as I tried to make sense of things. I willed my body to go back to being normal but when Vaughn’s hand slid over his own stomach, drawing up his shirt a little in the process, my mouth suddenly felt like it had been stuffed full of cotton. He wasn’t pale and soft like Father had been. His skin was darker, but not as dark as mine, and there was just a little bit of black hair that trailed down his body and disappeared into his pants. Would the hair feel the same as the hair on his beard? I automatically looked up at his face again. A strange itchiness began running through my fingers, then up my arms and out to the rest of my body.
I knew I should get up and go to the bathroom, so I could wash my hands and face with cold water to help clear my mind, but my body wouldn’t listen to the silent command. Instead, I found myself shifting so I was sitting cross-legged at the head of the bed. I leaned my upper body against the headboard so I could see Vaughn’s face straight on. I actually found myself waiting for him to say my name again.