Total pages in book: 149
Estimated words: 141255 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 706(@200wpm)___ 565(@250wpm)___ 471(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 141255 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 706(@200wpm)___ 565(@250wpm)___ 471(@300wpm)
My expression must’ve dropped. He gave me a squeeze. “I told him I’d let him know. I didn’t do it on the spot, probably ‘cuz I didn’t know if I could let you go. After having you last night, call me a dog, but I wanted you again. Saw you when I got home and was gonna ask you what you wanted. Then the way you looked at me? Fuck, the way you look at me, Angel…”
He swallowed and gave his head a shake. “All day I wanted to kiss you, be inside you. Watching you shop, seeing you smile, it got to me. And you taking the pet name I gave you as your new name? Shit, baby. After getting a taste of you I couldn’t stop myself. And now after having you again? You talking to me like that and begging me to spank you, asking me for permission to touch yourself? Thanking me for making you come, for letting you make yourself come? Fuck, baby. This was even better than last night and last night was fuck-hot.”
“It was amazing,” I agreed, goosebumps all over me, warmth in my chest like I hadn’t felt in years, maybe even ever.
“What do you want?”
“This,” I answered.
“You’ve got this hero worship thing happenin’ and I am a fuckin’ dog for letting it get carried away. I wanna say I really wanted to not go here with you but it’s only been a few days. Clearly, I didn’t try that hard. But the way you look at me, the way you are when we fuck, it’s too much.”
I kissed his chin and snuggled in. I couldn’t believe I felt so bold to do that. But I did. And it felt awesome to just snuggle in close to him like that.
He put an arm tight around me. “I dunno, babe. I just don’t want if this thing with us goes somewhere and for you, as your life gets normal again, to suddenly realize you don’t want this.”
“I won’t,” I whispered.
“How do you know that?”
I didn’t have an answer for him. I just couldn’t imagine not wanting him.
He continued, “Because once I’ve decided you’re mine I won’t be willing to let you go unless you do something to shred my heart. Maybe I should give you space, let you figure out what you want before we take this any further.”
“Maybe you should,” I said softly.
He raised his eyebrows for a second and then moistened his lips and nodded.
“But please don’t,” I said.
He shook his head and sighed but he looked relieved, I think.
“What do you want outta life?” he asked me.
I shrugged. “It has been a long time since I let myself think about that. All I’ve thought about for so many months, is this. Getting sold so I could get out of there. That’s what I did, Dare. I worked hard to make them trust me so I could be sold. I didn’t play them. Please don’t think I’m playing you. I didn’t play anyone, I just tried really hard to be good enough. And I’d never ever shred your heart. Never ever.”
He shook his head and was quiet a minute, studying me, before saying, “So, what if you and I carry on and suddenly you realize what you want isn’t this?”
“I don’t think that’ll happen,” I said and my heart wanted to leap with joy because it sounded like he did want this, want me.
“Because you thought you’d have nothing better,” he said, “Because you thought this was the best scenario you could get, getting sold. But I don’t wanna be someone’s best case scenario. I want a woman who worships the ground I walk on. I want a woman who lets me do the same for her and who appreciates that I worship her. I want a woman who wants what I want outta life.”
“You deserve nothing less.” God, he was amazing. He wanted a relationship, not a slave; a partner in life.
“And if this thing with us goes where it could go, I might always wonder if it’s enough for you. And you might never ask for more because you’ll think you don’t deserve more. What if looking at me always reminds you of how you came to be mine? What if being with me means you can’t ever totally forget that hell that they put you through? I know this is a lot but I need this on the table. In the situation we’re in we can’t afford to just play things by ear. Does what I’m saying even make sense?”
I nodded. “It does. I know my head isn’t on straight. But I know that with all that you’ve given me so far that I have a very good chance of it finding its way to straightening out.”
He rolled his eyes. “I feel like a fuckin’ dog.”