Touch of Hate Read Online J.L. Beck, Cassandra Hallman

Categories Genre: Alpha Male, Contemporary, Dark, Forbidden, Mafia, Romance Tags Authors: ,
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Total pages in book: 132
Estimated words: 125465 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 627(@200wpm)___ 502(@250wpm)___ 418(@300wpm)
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“I don’t either, but I knew I needed to tell you.”

I force a ragged breath into my body, but it doesn’t feel like it reaches my lungs. It doesn’t even feel like I’m breathing. Before I can stop it, the tears glistening in my eyes break free and slide shamelessly down my cheeks. I’m crying for so many things right now, things I have to hold inside.

“Fuck, look. I knew I shouldn’t have told you, but I didn’t want to risk you being attacked next. I don’t know what the hell is going on with Ren, but he’s… he’s not who we thought he was. He’s unstable, and if he’s willing to hurt Aspen and me, then I don’t know for certain if anything would stop him from hurting you.”

In my mind, I try to picture him as the enemy, as the grim wolf stalking us lambs like his next meal, but I can’t. The Ren I knew, the man I had already fallen in love with and had always had a crush on, would never hurt the people he cared about. I didn’t even realize my cries had intensified. A ragged sob rips from my throat, and I can barely see the cell phone screen anymore.

“Scar, please.” The desperation in his voice kills me. “Please stop crying. I am on the verge of burning this entire fucking place down and searching every inch of this planet for him. He’s my best friend, and the thought…”

“It wasn’t him, Q. There’s no way. You’re like a brother to him, and he knows how much you love Aspen. He wouldn’t do that to you, to us, to his family.”

Denial coats each word I speak with a sticky substance. Deep in the pit of my stomach, the first seeds of anger start to take root.

How could he do this, and why?

“I’ve been mewling over this for days, trying to figure out how to tell you because, deep down, I don’t want to believe it either.” He lets out a sigh, and the look of despair in his dark eyes confirms his response. I can see the heavy bags beneath, and I have no doubt that he has hardly slept in the past few days.

“Then don’t. We both know it’s not true. We just…we need to find him. I’m sure there is a reason for his disappearance.”

It wasn’t a coincidence that Ren disappeared right after these things happened. He was guilty as charged, and there was no way around it. The problem was I didn’t want to believe it. I didn’t want to believe the man I had given my heart to was a monster capable of hurting his own family. It wasn’t possible. He wouldn’t do this to me. He promised me forever. We were going to find a way to be together. He was going to wait for me.

“He’s gone, Scarlet.” Q shakes his head, pulling me back to the present, reminding me this isn’t a nightmare I’ll be able to wake up from. “He’s gone, and now I have to worry if he’s going to come for you or Mom next. Hell, maybe he’s going to show back up here at Corium and try to finish me off. I don’t know. I thought I knew him, and now I’m just so lost.”

“Stop, don’t say that.” My voice cracks as I scold him.

How could he think that about him?

The muscles in his jaw tighten. “I’m only speaking the truth. I want you to know I’m here for you. You can call me anytime you need to. Dad will be tightening up security.”

“Are you coming home?” It’s the only thing I can think to ask, especially with all the thoughts racing through my mind.

“I was considering it, to be there for Mom and you, but I think it’s better if I stay here. We’re heavily protected at Corium, and Ren is long gone by now.”

The reminder pierces my heart, the knife’s edge sinking deep inside the muscle. I don’t know if I can live without Ren.

I’m consumed by him, wrapped up in every detail of who we were meant to be, and now he’s gone. Now I’m lost, without a purpose or place, and he’s a ghost, slipping through time like he never existed at all.

I don’t trust myself to speak about him right now, or I might spill all our secrets. I can’t believe what my brother is telling me. Every thought I have is hinged on a memory, and I realize that maybe I didn’t know Ren at all.

“I’m sorry, Scar. I’m really sorry. I know Ren was like a brother to you as well.”

“It’s okay,” I lie, but it’s not okay. Nothing will ever be okay again.

“All right, well, I need to go, but I’ll call you later to make sure everything is good. If you need anything, call me, and if Ren tries to contact you… tell Dad.”



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