Total pages in book: 59
Estimated words: 55626 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 278(@200wpm)___ 223(@250wpm)___ 185(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 55626 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 278(@200wpm)___ 223(@250wpm)___ 185(@300wpm)
His jaw clenched. Fine then. He'd make things real easy for her, rip his own heart out for her, he'd do everything for her, because that was how pathetic he had become.
But when he tried putting her down, her legs tightened around his waist instead. And when he tried untangling her arms around his neck, she leaned back and shook her head. "N-No."
What the fuck?
"I'm not done speaking yet."
He opened his mouth to tell her he already fucking got that she was leaving him, but before he could get one single word out, Diana had pressed a finger against his lips, and he immediately forgot what he had to say. She had never touched him like this, had never initiated contact like this, and it left him stunned, bemused, and...ah, fuck, it left him fucking hopeful.
"Let me speak first." Diana's voice quavered in the end, and while her eyes were still bright with tears, they were also sparkling with...mischief.
The professor inhaled sharply.
Only a soulless bitch could look mischievous when planning to break another guy's heart.
Which meant...
"I just have one last thing to say," Diana promised, "and then a-after that, you can do whatever you want with me—-aah!" One of Matthijs' hands had slid under her to give her bottom a good, hard squeeze, and at her look of astonishment, he smirked against her lips, as if saying, Whatever I want, right?
A laugh escaped her, but it turned halfway into a sob. "Oh, Professor." That smirk told her he understood she was staying. That smirk told her he wasn't going to make her leave anymore. That smirk...was everything.
And suddenly, she could no longer hold the words back.
"Professor—-" Her voice broke. "P-Professor, I love you."
A moment later, and Diana had to bite back a hysterical giggle as the professor responded by dumping her on her feet and practically tearing out of her hold like it was her who had HIV.
"No," Matthijs grated out. "You don't." Because it was one thing for her to come back, but another thing to say that.
"I'm sorry, but I'm afraid I do."
"No. You just think you feel that, but it's only fucking pity—-"
"I'd have to be the biggest idiot to pity someone as arrogant as you..." And then she only looked at him, letting her doe eyes say the rest.
And since I'm no idiot...
I'm not here because I pity you..
I'm here because I love you.
The professor wanted to slam his head against a wall. FUCK, FUCK, FUCK. Even without her saying a single thing, her dark eyes spoke loud and clear, and despite knowing that he was about to commit a mortal sin by letting her stay -
Let me have Heaven here, and Hell can have my soul later.
Diana held her breath when the professor suddenly spoke. "I wouldn't know about being arrogant..."
Their eyes met.
"But if you think that and yet you still say you love me..."
And suddenly everything became clear.
"Then I suppose you are an idiot."
Oh God.
A laugh escaped her, and once again it turned into a sob halfway, and then it kept on coming, laughter and sobs mixed into one. Because with him saying those words - with him joking - with him looking at her like he also knew - like his soul also found its mate - Diana knew she had won.
They had won.
She threw herself at him, still crying and laughing, and it was like coming back home as his arms locked around her shaking body.
Her tears wet his shirt. I really love you, Professor.
His arms tightened around her. I know. And more fool you.
Her body shook with laughter, and so did his, because even if words hadn't been spoken, their souls heard each other just fine.
With Diana once again in his arms, the professor carried her to the living room, but as soon as they were both on the couch, she came crawling to his lap, arms around his neck and her head lying against his chest.
The strangest feeling crept upon him, something unfamiliar and powerful, and it took him a while to realize the feelings were nothing but...peace.
Because she was with him again, he was at peace, and while his own feelings were probably just a fraction of what Diana's beloved Saint Augustine had felt upon finding his perfect dwelling in God's love, Matthijs could think no better than the sainted bishop's words to describe how he felt—-
Our heart is restless, until it repose in Thee.
He closed his eyes.
That was exactly how he felt.
His heart had been restless until it rested in Diana, and it was just too fucking bad he had not met her sooner, at a time when he had been a better man, and his heart had been purer, and his body uncontaminated.
The thought reminded the professor of the many things he was still honor-bound to say, but when he tried to pull away, he felt her sweet, gentle resistance, with the faint shake of her head and the way her arms tightened around him.