Total pages in book: 74
Estimated words: 70485 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 352(@200wpm)___ 282(@250wpm)___ 235(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 70485 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 352(@200wpm)___ 282(@250wpm)___ 235(@300wpm)
I took a deep breath, which didn’t help. The smells in this house… I’d suppressed those too. It smelled like my childhood. Food, oil, the vinegar Ma put in the cleaning spray or whatever it was.
On the flip side, my ma’s intrusive prodding had actually opened up a conversation between Nikki and me. Maybe giving Colin a sibling wasn’t a bad idea. I was warming up to it, anyway.
Last night, when we’d taken Colin for a walk after dinner, she’d confessed that she had feelings for someone significantly older than her. The man was currently going through a nasty divorce, and nothing had happened. And she’d said, “If something ever does happen, I know he won’t be interested in having kids. The two he has are in college.”
“And you know…now that you’re gay and all, there’s always artificial insemination.”
I flinched at that particular memory. Some jokes weren’t as funny. She’d quickly realized that. But I guessed I needed to hear it. Just…hearing the word gay being associated with me. It couldn’t hurt. I still felt a genuine draw to women, at least I thought I did, so maybe…bisexual? God. I didn’t know. Either way, the embarrassment and shame around those two terms had to fucking go. Otherwise, I’d never figure shit out.
I felt guilty as hell about that shame. Like I was insulting every gay or bisexual being out there, and that was the last thing I wanted. Even more so because Roe was one of those people, and he was the best person I knew.
I missed him so fucking much.
Backing away from the bag again, I lifted my tee and wiped my face.
At the same time, I heard the door open from the house, and Nikki stood there.
“Where’s Bear?” I asked.
She smirked faintly and closed the door behind her. “He’s watching the news with your dad. I think he’ll live.”
Okay. Good. And Ma was busy preparing dinner, so she wouldn’t have time to stick her fingers into our boy’s brain.
“Did Roe reach out yet?” she asked.
I nodded with a dip of my chin. “Ten fingers, ten toes. They named him Casper.”
Nikki smiled and raised her eyebrows. “Why am I not surprised?”
For chrissakes. “Don’t read into that. He’s called me brother more times than I can count. It’s nothing weird to name a kid after someone you view as a family member.”
“Uh-huh. I bet he didn’t view you as a brother in Vegas.”
“Woman, I swear.” I never should’ve told her that part. I’d known the second I did, it was gonna come back and bite me in the ass.
I reckoned I should consider myself lucky I hadn’t given her any details, just that Roe and I had crossed a line or four when we’d been three sheets to the wind.
“Don’t swear. Your ma might smack you with a bible,” she teased.
I rumbled a chuckle and figured my workout was over. I wanted to shower before dinner. “Let’s head in. Maybe we can tell my folks we’re dressing up as demons for Halloween.”
“Oh, they’d love that,” she laughed.
I grinned.