Total pages in book: 83
Estimated words: 79621 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 398(@200wpm)___ 318(@250wpm)___ 265(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 79621 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 398(@200wpm)___ 318(@250wpm)___ 265(@300wpm)
“Never, Jake. You will never ever lose me.”
He blinked through a sheen of tears and sat against the shiny red faux-leather upholstery. “Then I think we’re okay.”
“I love you,” I whispered. “Have I told you how proud I am of you?”
Jake rolled his eyes. “Like twenty million times.”
I grinned and blew my nose. “Good. I’ll never stop saying it. Thank you. I don’t know if anything will come of…this, but it would be nice.”
“Yeah, I think so too. I want you to be happy. Same as you want for me. I love you, Dad.”
It took a good minute to compose myself. If we hadn’t been in public, I would have been sobbing ugly tears. God knew I was a mess as it was.
But it was all out there—every fear, every concern, all the things we never said had been said. I was a lucky man. So damn lucky.
While this didn’t change anything between Smitty and me, it gave me hope. And for now, that would have to be enough.
22
SMITTY
Bryson was gone and from what I could tell, the whole town was worried about him. Not Jake…Bryson. I overheard conversations at Rise and Grind and Henderson’s Bakery. Even Dale asked me if I’d heard from our neighbor.
“Nice man, that Bryson. Good soul. I know he’s worried about Jake, but I hope he’s doing all right.”
Yeah, me too.
But I didn’t text him. I wanted to give him space to be with his kid, and maybe I needed the time apart to think too. He’d brought up some fair points. Coming out didn’t seem like a big deal to me, but coming out and going public about my relationship with a man was…well, that also didn’t seem like a big deal. So what? Who cared?
Hockey fans might. Again…I didn’t care. He was right to think it might make the news and be attached directly to Jake, though. That part was between them. But I was all in. No doubts. I wanted to come out.
Don’t get me wrong…of course, it freaked me the fuck out. But I didn’t want to hide and I didn’t want to lose the best thing that had come into my life in years.
I wasn’t doing this for Bryson, though. I was doing it for me. This was my new start and it was time to make my own moves.
What began as an informal check-in for Riley when he needed help staying on top of affairs between the rink and the high school had evolved into a semi-organized coaches’ meeting. In attendance today were Vinnie, Riley, Court, Quinn, and me. Our new coach for the women’s team usually joined us but couldn’t make it today. Ronnie wasn’t here either. But that was okay. We’d covered upcoming games, rosters changes, and brainstormed playoff strategies before they began gossiping about Jake’s chances of getting called up next season.
According to Vinnie, whose old agent represented Jake, something really big might be in the works.
“McD is fielding calls from the Kings and the Krakens. Or so he says,” Vinnie reported from our corner booth at the diner. “One third of what comes out of his mouth is pure bullshit, but that other two-thirds…I don’t know. Elmwood might have a new NHL player soon. Hear that, Mr. Johnson? You’re gonna owe me a cup of coffee!”
I glanced over at the old man shamelessly eavesdropping from the booth next to ours, rubbing his hands like a kid in a candy store.
“Best news I’ve heard all day,” Mr. Johnson replied, sliding to his feet. He left a few dollars on the table and patted Vinnie’s shoulder. “When the ink is dry, I’ll buy the whole town a cup of coffee.”
“Buy it from Rise and Grind, though,” Court interjected. “Our coffee is better.”
Vinnie nudged Court’s elbow and scoffed without heat ’cause it was true, and we all knew it. The rest of us chuckled and returned to our breakfasts and our weekly conversation regarding the state of hockey in Elmwood.
These sessions were good for me. They made me feel more connected to a community that operated on handshakes and goodwill passed down from generation to generation. I was an outsider here. If I wanted to stay and make a mark, I had to learn about these people. And I had to let them know me. After months of skirting around my big truth, I was ready to be completely honest.
So, in the least diplomatic, ungraceful way possible, I shoveled a forkful of hash brown into my mouth and blurted, “I’m bisexual. In case anyone cares.”
Silence.
Quinn coughed and sputtered, “Congratulations? Is that what you’re supposed to say?”
I shrugged. “Dunno. Just wanted to get it out there.”
Riley, Court, and Vinnie exchanged a look I couldn’t read to save my life.
Vinnie snorted. “Your voice carries. You know that, right? You told the whole damn town.”