Series: Shame On You Series by Willow Winters
Total pages in book: 55
Estimated words: 51495 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 257(@200wpm)___ 206(@250wpm)___ 172(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 51495 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 257(@200wpm)___ 206(@250wpm)___ 172(@300wpm)
Not just Declan's. All the Cross brothers.
The thought of it sends a chill down my spine.
“I have to go,” he says softly, like he doesn’t want to leave me here, either.
My eyes beg him, but his returning look is one that is apologetic, yet unmoving. Swallowing thickly, I ask, “Are you going to be gone long?”
Declan frowns, tension in his eyes. Something bubbles under the surface, and once again I can’t help but notice that he knows much more than I do. It's something that scares me.
“Declan. What’s wrong?” I manage to question, not knowing where the line is with us anymore.
“Nothing.”
The sheets rustle as I sit up straighter. “Please don’t lie to me.”
He buttons his crisp white collared shirt, taking his time with each one, but he pauses and looks at me. This time, there’s a crackle, almost like electricity in the air. It makes me feel short of breath. The expression on Declan’s face tells me that he’s making a decision and that I need to understand.
“Declan…” His name is cautious on my lips.
“I want you to marry me.”
The world stops. It just seems to hang there, not spinning, no time passing. I’m not even sure my heart is beating. Marry him? After everything? I don’t know what I imagined he would say, but I didn’t see this coming at all.
The shocked word leaves me, “What?” He can’t have said what I heard.
Declan’s expression is so unnervingly serious that it reminds me of how he was when he came into the bedroom last night. “Don’t say yes or no right now.”
I can’t say anything. I don’t say a word. He asked me to marry him. Declan Cross just said those words to me.
“I’m going to go out for a while. Then I’ll be back, and we can talk. Just don’t say no.”
My body is ringing. This is all too much, too fast. I can barely breathe.
I’m overwhelmed. I thought the night of sleep had mostly made up for how stressed and tired I was, but it doesn’t seem to have done enough now.
Even if I could speak, what am I supposed to say to him? I don’t know Declan as well as I thought I did, but I don’t think he’s lying about having to head out for a while.
I open my mouth to tell him that I won’t say no, not right now, and end up nodding instead.
He drops his hands away from the buttons of his shirt. “Can you just let me love you right now?”
All the turmoil in my heart doesn’t make me want to deny him. I’m not sure of anything right now, but those words out of Declan’s mouth feel like a life raft. Like they’re the only things that can keep me from drowning. They feel like something to hold on to, at least to get me through to when he comes back—
I clear my throat just to get a whisper out. “Yes.”
He lets out a relieved noise then crosses the room to me, takes my face in his hands, and kisses me into the pillows. Deep and needy like the night before. He’s already showered, and the clean scent of him overwhelms me again. His touch, his desperation…it’s fucking everything. Nothing else matters.
I can’t help that I love him. That when he kisses me, he soothes every pain and worry. I can’t help the way my body wants to be near his. I touch his shoulders and his arms and his neck. I pull him in as close as I can. Declan does the same to me. If he didn’t have to leave, I think he’d get back into the bed with me and stay here.
Nothing can be simple, can it? There’s always something waiting to screw things up.
His mouth on mine doesn’t feel screwed up, though I know parts of it are. We still need to talk through everything that happened and why he lied. That seems less important than why he wants to marry me. Uncertainty makes my stomach clench.
“You really want to marry me?” I whisper as he pulls away.
The Cross brothers are strong and powerful, but right now, Declan is doing this for me. He wouldn’t do this for anything else. All the emotions of the past forty-eight hours run across his face again. So much fear that echoes my own.
“I need you to.” It’s strange to hear so much vulnerability from him.
Declan and his brothers don’t seem like they would need anything. They’re the kind of men who can take it for themselves. But Declan needs this from me. “I need to know you still love me and that you’ll be here tomorrow. I need you to know how badly I need you, and want you, and how committed I am to you.”
He starts to sit up straighter and I know he’s leaving. But I also know I won’t be okay until we address what happened. I can’t just leave it be. It’ll fester and I can’t have those thoughts coming back.