Total pages in book: 35
Estimated words: 33804 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 169(@200wpm)___ 135(@250wpm)___ 113(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 33804 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 169(@200wpm)___ 135(@250wpm)___ 113(@300wpm)
"Talk to me, angel. What's going on in that pretty little head of yours? Did I upset you today?" I rarely inquire in this manner, eager for her response. But Tallulah, with tears streaming down her cheeks, remains silent. "Come on, Angel," I coax gently, "You know you can tell me everything. In fact, I demand you do. You're not allowed to keep anything from me."
"I just want the punishment," she whispers brokenly, expressing her desire for me to hurt her. Knowing she tends towards masochism, I hesitate to inflict pain on her. Although she seems to beg for it, I can't bring myself to harm her. "Be a good girl for me. I know you can do it. Open those pretty little lips and tell me what's going through your mind," I encourage softly.
However, she avoids meeting my eyes, creating an uncomfortable moment of silence.
"I don't want to listen to you," she finally whispers. "I just want you to hurt me. That's all I'm good for, right?" Suddenly, she pushes away from me with heavy palms on my chest, attempting to run off. I catch her wrist again and pull her back towards me.
"You need to talk to me," I say more firmly. "You know your thoughts are not yours to keep. I want to know everything that's in there."
"I can't," she says, her voice breaking, a small sob escaping her lips. I pull her onto my lap, her arms around my neck, holding her tightly as she sobs. I'm torn between consoling her and understanding why she's suddenly so emotional.
I had believed I'd broken her for good, thinking she wouldn't return to her bratty personality, but this moment feels like she's woken up from her submissive state, something I'm unsure is good for her, despite my often misunderstood ethics and shaky morals. Holding her close, I gently run my hands through her long blonde hair, whispering comforting words.
Gradually, she calms down, worn out from the emotional upheaval. "Let's get you to bed," I suggest softly, carrying her to the bedroom. I tuck her in and even allow the dogs onto the bed with her. They curl up protectively at the foot of the bed, licking Tallulah's fingers peeking out from under the duvet. Her eyelids grow heavy, and she struggles to focus her gaze on me.
"Sleep, angel," I say softly, kissing her forehead. As Tallulah drifts off into a deeper slumber, her breathing growing heavier, I feel it's appropriate to step away, despite feeling guilty for leaving her in that state.
I'm bewildered by how she seemingly woke up from her submissive state and what it implies for our relationship. The fact that it's stirred my moral compass, which has been dormant for decades, is deeply concerning. I groan, running a hand through my hair, realizing I've become undeniably and irreversibly attached to her.
"You okay, padron?" Saul asks me later that day during a meeting. "Where is your wife?"
Initially, I don't want to answer him, but we're alone in the room and he's the only person I trust. I figure it won't hurt to confide in him.
"She broke today," I mutter. "Broke character, which made me feel... Fuck."
I run a hand through my hair, fucking frustrated with this whole thing. I don't feel. I don't do emotions. Emotional people are fucking weak, and that's not an adjective I associate with myself.
"She started bratting again?" Saul asks.
"It was more than that," I groan, rubbing my temples and contemplating getting a drink to help with my nerves. "She completely broke and acted as if I'd kept her prisoner to her own mind. Then she was back to behaving, after one slap. That fucking easy."
"So she's switching," Saul adds. "Perhaps it's hard for her to come to terms with her new life. It could be a dissociation technique her mind does to her to keep her unharmed."
"You might have a fucking point," I hiss. "But I don't want two versions of Tallulah. I want all of her. I want her to be fully herself when she's with me."
"I understand." Saul grimaces. "Unfortunately, padron, we have more issues to deal with on top of that."
I exhale and nod. "Alright, tell me what's been going on."
"The Scorpion cartel is becoming a bigger problem than we initially thought," murmurs my right-hand man. "And many of us can't understand why you're not treating this as a problem at all."
"I've told you before," I grind out, "this has nothing to do with any of you and everything to do with me and my brother."
"Your brother sure is stirring up a lot of trouble for our men," Saul says, resting his head in his palms. "It's not just me who's worried; Julio and even Phoenix have been making unsettling comments."
"Julio?" I let off an amused laugh. "So we're listening to the words of a barely initiated Hitman now? You should know better than that, Saul. He's nothing but a sicario. You've done plenty to antagonize him. You can't expect loyalty if you don't give them a reason to follow."