Total pages in book: 56
Estimated words: 50561 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 253(@200wpm)___ 202(@250wpm)___ 169(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 50561 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 253(@200wpm)___ 202(@250wpm)___ 169(@300wpm)
Panic set in as I tried to calm myself, to get back to that feeling of only a few short minutes ago. Could he be setting me up? I didn’t think so, but already I was buying things in my head. What did that say about me if anything? Did it mean that I was using him?
Inside, I knew that to be false, but what if that was the impression he got? I thought of the beautiful dress that I’d always wanted, the one I’d already priced over the years as trends changed. What if I decided to ditch that since I could now afford something more extravagant? Did that mean I was a user?
My stomach hurt with the implications and what had seemed like a good thing a little while ago now seemed like an albatross. Was it wrong to want nice things, to dream? I’d not given his money much thought until now. But what if he had?
I flung myself from the bed and got dressed in a hurry, calling down for the car. Tony didn’t ask too many questions once I told him I was going to my parents’ house, and I didn’t correct his assumption that Simon knew about my little trip.
Mom would know what to do. I threw the card in my bag and flung it over my shoulder as I ran down the stairs and out the house. Outside, the air was crisp and fall was in full bloom, but my usual joy in the season was tarnished by the thoughts in my head.
If Tony noticed my subdued manner, he didn’t mention it and I was glad for the silence as I tried to bring order to my thoughts. I rushed out of the car with a quick goodbye and I’ll call you when I’m ready and ran inside to my mom.
“Ashley. I wasn’t expecting you.” She was in the kitchen having her morning coffee. The cup stopped halfway to her lips when she got a good look at my face. “What is it, what’s wrong?”
“Oh momma.” I threw myself at her the way I did when I was a child and was hurt by some slight or other that seemed like the end of the world.
“Oh sweetheart, did you two have a fight? It’s not the end of the world.” I shook my head wildly and tried to explain through sobs until I got it all out.
“Oh, don’t be silly. I’m sure he doesn’t think any such thing. Now dry your tears and tell me what’s going on.”
“Momma, I told you. What if he thinks that’s all I want from him? What if he thinks I’m like her?” She rolled her eyes at that and sat me down next to her after cleaning my face. “I’m sure that’s not true. Why all you have to do is look at him to see how he cares for you. I think it’s just all hitting you at once is all and that’s natural.”
“What is?” I’m not sure we were talking about the same thing. She seemed rather relaxed while my whole world was falling apart. “Look honey. Your dad and I have always done our best to give you the things you need. Now you have this man showering you with gifts and giving you a card with no limit, bless his heart.” She smiled and shook her head.
“Of course you’re gonna want to shop, who wouldn’t? But it doesn’t make you a bad person. Did you ask him for the card?”
“Of course not.” I wiped new tears from my eyes and listened. I was already starting to feel better from the soothing tone of her voice.
“Well, there you have it, you didn’t ask and he gave it freely of his own free will. I’d think he’d expect you to use the thing. Besides, as the wife of such an established man you’re going to need to change a few things don’t you think? So what if he wants you to look nice? I think it’s sweet. Your dad gives me money all the time, does that make me a gold digger?”
“No but that’s different.”
“How so? Okay, so your Simon has a bit more in the bank than dad but it’s the same principle dear. I think it shows that he doesn’t think that of you.” She spent the next half hour calming me down and trying to get me to see the light. I felt better for coming and that sick feeling soon evaporated.
We spent the next few hours chatting and going over wedding stuff, but always in the back of my mind was that damn card. I suddenly had an idea and jumped up from the table. “I know exactly what I need to do. Come with me mom I’m going get Simon something nice, it will be my first purchase.” The idea, made me feel a whole lot better.