Total pages in book: 104
Estimated words: 95326 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 477(@200wpm)___ 381(@250wpm)___ 318(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 95326 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 477(@200wpm)___ 381(@250wpm)___ 318(@300wpm)
Reluctantly, he pulled away from her, stood, and went to the door and stepped outside. He went to the rain barrel and splashed handfuls of water in his face, not once but three times. Then he stood there, hands braced on the rim of the rain barrel, water dripping from his face, silently cursing himself.
Elsie sat up, staring at the closed door not knowing what she had done wrong. Or was it as she feared that seeing her, kissing her, touching her when he could clearly see her made him realize that he did not favor her after all? That the one night they had shared together was magical because he could not see how plain she was and did not care if she felt thin, his need for a woman too great, but now that he could see her clearly, he desired her no more.
“It does not matter,” she said to the empty room and took a deep breath to push back tears and got to her feet.
Her only concern was for her da and sisters. She would make certain he helped her and if when all was done, he wished to end their marriage, she would not object. The only problem she did not know how to solve was the hurt she felt in her heart, and she admonished herself for caring for a man she barely knew and who would never care for her.
She hurried to don her tunic, promising herself she would always remain fully dressed in front of him. Never, not ever, would she stand naked or even partially dressed in front of her husband.
The door opened as she was moving the bucket off the table and her husband quickly took it from her.
“Are you finished? Do you need more water?” he asked, annoyed at seeing the upset in his wife’s eyes and her changed demeanor and knowing it was his fault.
“Enough to wash our hands after we eat,” she said and turned away to stir the contents of the cauldron even though it didn’t need it.
“Elsie,” he said.
“Aye,” she said but did not turn to look at him.
“Look at me!” he snapped.
She turned, her heart thumping madly and her stomach roiling, hearing the annoyance in his voice. He would tell her now, tell her that he had no interest in her.
“I will not chance getting you with child.”
“Aye, so you have told me,” she said and wondered if he spoke the truth or if it was an excuse so he need not speak the truth.
“Then stop tempting me,” he warned, annoyed at himself again for blaming her and went to the door, shutting it so hard it rattled.
Elsie stared dumbfounded at the door. Whatever did he mean that she tempted him? She had no idea how she tempted him, but if he believed she tempted him, and he surrendered to the temptation, then could it possibly mean that he found her appealing? Or was it nothing more than a need that rose to torment him and being his wife, she was available to him?
She shook her head. She could not be any more confused than she felt now or what to do about it. She reminded herself that there were more important matters to dwell on and she would leave this be for now, not wanting her heart to hurt any more than it already did.
“You barely ate anything, no wonder you are so thin. You need to eat,” Cavell said and handed her a piece of meat.
She waved the meat away and turned her head. “I had enough. I can stomach no more.”
She had lost her appetite after the incident between them, and she had to force herself to eat the little she had eaten. It also did not help to hear him say what many had said to her since she was young about her being thin because she did not eat enough. Those who knew her well knew she possessed a hardy appetite, but no matter what she ate she remained thin.
She was still upset, and he knew full well that she had been looking forward to tonight’s meal and that it was his fault she did not eat. But what should it matter to him? He barely knew her and yet he enjoyed getting to know her, learning things about her, something he had never cared to do with a woman.
Feeling the need to lighten her spirits, he gave her a casual poke on the arm and smiled. “At least it won’t take much to feed you.”
She snapped her head around ready to glare at him only to see a teasing glint in his eyes and tossed her chin up a notch. “I need no one to feed me. I can take care of myself.”
“You would deprive me of my duty, wife?” he asked as if affronted yet continuing to smile.