Total pages in book: 109
Estimated words: 105080 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 525(@200wpm)___ 420(@250wpm)___ 350(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 105080 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 525(@200wpm)___ 420(@250wpm)___ 350(@300wpm)
Chapter Thirty-One
Anson
We went to the kitchen and opened the food containers.
“Where’s your sauce?” Jeremy asked.
“He’s a professional athlete. He eats healthy shit,” West replied.
“Sucks for you,” Jeremy told me.
It was hard to stamp down the feelings flooding my chest. When I’d opened the door, called West baby, and saw someone else standing there, I’d nearly lost it. I’d wanted to run, to lie and try to make an excuse, to say it wasn’t what it looked like, but I knew there was no way around it.
Then, when West found me in the laundry room, I was skittish…upset, but mixed in with that had been guilt. This was West’s best friend. West and I were in love. I hated asking him to hide for me, hated that I’d wanted to deny him. If I couldn’t do this around the most important person to West, how would we ever last?
But now, just a few minutes later, Jeremy was joking with me about how I ate. He’d told me we stick together—we, as in people like me, like him. It was one thing coming from West, but hearing it from someone else was the first time in my life I’d felt part of a community. Well, other than football. And maybe, just maybe, I needed that.
West grabbed drinks from the fridge—beers for himself and Jeremy, water for me.
The second we were at the table, digging into our food, Jeremy asked, “So how in the hell did you find this guy?” Realization hit him then. “The football game? I did this?”
West laughed. “You don’t get credit for him, fucker. I scored my man all by myself.”
They teased each other back and forth, and I just sat there, watching them. I’d never gotten to see this side of West. We were only ever on the phone, or when we were together, it was just us. It was nice to see him interact with Jeremy. It made him real in a whole new way for me, and I wondered…wondered if he needed that from me too. And if he didn’t now, when he would.
“He sat next to me at a hotel bar,” I finally said. “He started talking to me.”
“Because who wouldn’t?” Jeremy said, and West swatted him. “Shit. Sorry. I can’t help it. He’s gorgeous.”
“I didn’t know who he was, obviously. I just saw a beautiful man and, well, you know how it is.”
They laughed. This was a thing they did often, I realized—talking about men. Jealousy poked at me.
“I asked him to leave with me. He turned me down, but like Cinderella, left his glasses behind.”
“I was freaked out that he knew. No one had ever— Like I said, no one knows.”
“Ever?” Jeremy asked.
When I shook my head, a wave of sadness washed over him. Fuck, I hated being pitied.
West jumped in. “It wasn’t until we were at the game and they announced his first name that I discovered who he was. His name is unique. When I looked up and saw his face on the screen, I nearly lost my shit.”
“I fucking bet. I’m still trying to wrap my brain around the fact that this is happening,” Jeremy replied.
“I reached out to him about his sunglasses, and we started talking.”
“Now your sudden obsession with football makes sense and…his fucking jersey. He wears that thing around here like it’s his most prized possession. You, my friend, have West whipped—oh look, it even sounds good together. West Whipped. Whipped West.”
“Fuck you, Jeremy. Jeremy, fuck you.”
“I knew something was going on with him,” Jeremy went on, unfazed. “He rarely goes out. I haven’t seen him with a guy in months. Hell, I was horny and asked him to fuck, and he turned me down.”
Jeremy said it like it were no big deal, and to him, it probably wasn’t, but my heart dropped, falling down to my feet somewhere. “You guys have… I thought you were in a relationship?”
Jeremy’s eyes widened, and he bit his lip as if he wished he could take the words back.
“Jeremy and Bobby have an agreement. They have rules they both abide by, and it has to be with people they both trust, but they’re allowed to have sex with other men, and yes, Jeremy and I have done that, but we haven’t for a very long time, and we won’t again.”
“I’m sorry. I have a habit of sticking my foot in my mouth,” Jeremy added.
“No, it’s fine. I can’t control what’s already happened, and I trust West.” But it did make me wonder if that was the kind of relationship he would want with me. Would West want to fuck other men? Especially considering we wouldn’t be able to see each other often.
I wasn’t sure that was something I could handle.
West leaned closer and kissed my forehead. I pulled back instinctively, and saw the flash of hurt in his eyes. I didn’t know if it was because he thought I didn’t want him to show affection in front of Jeremy, and maybe that was partly the reason. At this point, though, that ship had sailed, since Jeremy knew. I just… I hated how inexperienced I was, hated that West felt he had to coddle me like I was weak and he had to protect me.