Total pages in book: 165
Estimated words: 154925 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 775(@200wpm)___ 620(@250wpm)___ 516(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 154925 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 775(@200wpm)___ 620(@250wpm)___ 516(@300wpm)
“Say your safe word, Mae. We’re in the club. You know how to make this stop.” He knew exactly what she was doing, but it was good to get the rules of engagement out on the board.
She groaned and struggled again. But that safe word did not come out of her mouth.
Perhaps this was the only way she could deal with him tonight. He’d put her in a corner, and she had her pride. He’d been a fool to think she would melt for him. He’d put her in this situation, and he had to help her find a way out.
MaeBe was a longtime sub. She knew the rules and understood that all she had to say to make him walk away was to spit out the word she’d selected that would stop any top she was playing with. It would absolutely stop him, and then he would do what he’d promised. He would sleep on the floor outside her door and make sure no one could hurt her.
He opened the door marked Ménage Mahal. It was the largest of the privacy rooms and was lushly decorated. They wouldn’t need the multiples of each toy and binding, but he appreciated the space because it seemed like Mae wanted to beat on him. He could handle it.
Besides, some of the other rooms had cages, and he wouldn’t put it past her to lock him in one.
He closed the door behind them and set her on the floor. “Do you want to do this here, or we can go down to the dungeon. I can chase you if you want.”
He could let her fight him in a safe way. She could beat those fists against him all she liked and maybe she would feel better.
Her eyes narrowed as she stared up at him. “You think I’m going to play with you?”
“I think you need a release, and you can’t let me do it sweet and slow. I think you need to have the illusion of me forcing you to push past the wall you’ve built up,” he explained. “But it is an illusion. I love you. I won’t ever force you to do anything.”
“Except mourn you.”
He had no pithy reply to that. “I thought it was for the best. I thought I was saving you. Honestly, I think I was also punishing myself. I hated myself so much in that moment, hated that I’d fallen for her. I was ashamed.”
“I don’t care. I meant what I said. I stopped loving you when you left me behind in the cruelest way. But you’re right. I need something tonight. I just don’t need it from you.”
It made his gut twist, but he’d put them in this position. “Who have you been playing with? I’ll call him or her and get them up here if that’s what you need. I’ll make it happen.”
That made her stop. “You’ll bring in someone to fuck me?”
“I wasn’t thinking it would go that far,” he admitted, and he could feel bile rise. What the hell could he do? How far was she willing to push this? “I didn’t think I would fuck you, baby. I thought I would spank you until you cry. I…I don’t know that I can stand outside while you’re with someone else. Do you want to hurt me that badly?”
He wasn’t sure what he’d do if she said yes. It would be so far from his Mae that he would have to accept she might be changed forever.
She softened slightly. “I don’t want to hurt you at all. I never did. And I was lying. I didn’t play with anyone. I haven’t, but I want to. I want to get to the point that I can have that part of myself back. I used to walk into this club and pick a top for the night and I would play. Sometimes it was for fun. Sometimes it was because I’d had a rough week and I needed a cry.”
She struggled to cry, but a good spanking could open the door for her. She would sleep so well after a cry. At least that’s what she’d told him.
“Let me help you, baby. You can stop me any time you want. Don’t make me call in someone who doesn’t matter.”
Her eyes were sad as she looked up at him. “You don’t matter anymore.”
He tried not to let her see how much that hurt. “Then it shouldn’t mean anything that I’m the one giving you what you need. You had a terrible day. You were so out of control, and now you can’t let go and do what you need to do. If I don’t matter, then I’m nothing but a hard hand on your ass and a commanding voice to guide you on the path.”
He wanted to be so much more, but he didn’t have room to argue with her. If he survived the upcoming battle with Julia, they would have time to reconcile. He would spend the rest of his life making it all up to her, and he could start with giving her everything she needed with no strings attached.