Total pages in book: 71
Estimated words: 68166 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 341(@200wpm)___ 273(@250wpm)___ 227(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 68166 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 341(@200wpm)___ 273(@250wpm)___ 227(@300wpm)
I could spend some time with Tally and Julianna. Clear the air and try to move forward. Figure out this mess. As Leo said, reconnect. Find our common ground. I smiled grimly to myself.
Julianna.
She was our common ground.
I would start there.
Our daughter and an apology.
TALLY
I walked the apartment endlessly, rocking Julianna, soothing her. It was so unusual for her to be so fussy, but I wasn’t surprised. I was edgy and hadn’t eaten well, and it was affecting her. Finally, she settled, and I put her in the crib, staring down at her. Even asleep, she looked like Julian, so there was no denying her parentage even though I had tried. He was right. I had always been a horrible liar, and that hadn’t changed.
Everywhere I looked were memories. Of him. Of us. I felt as if I had traveled back in time to the day I left. When I peeked in the closet of the master bedroom, I found clothes I had left behind. Some of my toiletries in the drawers of the vanity. He hadn’t changed anything or thrown my things away. I would have thought that would have been the first thing he would have done. I carried some items into the guest room and put them away, grateful he hadn’t gotten rid of them. I had brought so little with me here since most of the room was needed for Julianna’s items. Babies required a lot of stuff when traveling. I rubbed at my breasts, feeling the ache. I needed to pump them, but I hadn’t brought the pump with me, so I needed to get one.
I sat down at the table by the laptop, looking at Julian’s note.
Buy what you need.
I’ll pay for the cart when I get home.
Groceries can be ordered through this app—Fill Your Cart. Credit card online already, so fill the fridge and cupboards. They are sparse.
I wasn’t surprised he didn’t leave me his credit card. He didn’t trust me. I didn’t think he ever fully did, which had been part of the problem. And now I barely recognized him. Julian had always been in control. He rarely displayed his real emotions, unless you counted his desire. That, he shared with me in spades. Our love life had been intense and passionate. The few times I saw his anger, it had been directed toward others—usually those he felt were going to hurt me.
Now, it was directed at me. I sighed as I stared at the cup of coffee I had made and not even tasted. I didn’t blame him for his anger, but it scared me. The thought of him taking away Julianna struck a fear in me that ran so deep it made me tremble. His threats and barbed innuendos sent me into a tailspin.
Then at moments, he was gentle. Like when he embraced me after Julianna’s bath. The look on his face when he first held her. That was the Julian I remembered. The man I missed so much at times I ached with it. When I had watched him with her after her bath, the emotion of the moment had hit me. He had held me so tenderly, and I felt such relief at being back in his arms, it scared me. I couldn’t get used to that again.
I stared at the computer and made a decision. I opened the grocery app and filled the cart with everything I could think of. I needed to keep up my strength and eat properly for Julianna’s sake. Then I clicked on Amazon, logging in to my old account, surprised somehow that it was still there and accepted the password I remembered. I went to the baby section and began shopping. Julian said to buy what I wanted or needed for both Julianna and myself.
I was going to do just that.
The door opened a short time later, and I looked up, surprised to see Julian home so soon. It had only been a few hours. The Julian I had known had a hard time tearing himself away from his office.
“Hello,” I said warily.
“Hi,” he replied, putting a bag on the table where I was sitting. He indicated the laptop. “Shopping?”
“Yes. I ordered groceries which should be here soon, and I have a full cart on Amazon. A very full cart.”
He sat down, pulling the laptop close and looking at the items. Then without saying a word, he entered his credit card information and hit the order button. “I added Prime. Most of this will be here tomorrow.”
“Great.”
“There wasn’t as much as I thought. Julianna doesn’t need more clothes or…” He trailed off.
“I prefer to do that in person. I like to feel what I’m buying her.”
“Did you eat?” he asked, his voice level.
“No. I’ll heat up some leftovers.”
“I brought you soup and a sandwich from the café. I remembered how much you liked their broccoli soup.”