Total pages in book: 77
Estimated words: 72647 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 363(@200wpm)___ 291(@250wpm)___ 242(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 72647 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 363(@200wpm)___ 291(@250wpm)___ 242(@300wpm)
His father nodded and stepped down, joining him on the lawn. “I suppose my question is what you’re going to get out of the experience. You told me you didn’t think you wanted to work security.”
“It seems to be the only thing I’m halfway good at.” Which was precisely the problem.
“Ah, so you’re feeling the pressure, are you?” his father asked.
“Pressure? No one puts pressure on me. I come home and tell you I’ve left SASR and Mum simply gets my old room ready and you put me on the schedule. I thought the military was going to be my career.”
His father shrugged. “There’s no pressure from me or your mum. You want to help me around the station, I’m happy to have you. You want to go work at Mum’s clinic, she would love it. Your uncle’s business is the only one I’m going to ask you to stay out of, and you know damn well why.”
Because Uncle Alfi worked on the outer edges of morality. He’d been a fun guy to have around, but he could get into the wildest scrapes. “I don’t think he’s looking for a partner.”
His father snorted. “He’s always looking for a partner. I suppose I’m just wishing you didn’t have to go so far away to find yourself. This is the pressure I’m talking about.”
“I don’t understand.”
“Ah, but I do understand you,” his father said with a sigh. “I was you, son. I was the rather normal man madly in love with a brilliant woman who I couldn’t believe I deserved.”
His parents were some of the most solid people he’d ever known. While his friends’ folks were splitting up or taking breaks, his parents were obnoxiously in love.
He’d never felt romantic love either. Elodie fell in and out of love so easily, and he’d never felt more than some affection for the women he’d been with. Friendship and good sex had been the height of his relationships. “I think Mum would disagree.”
“Oh, she did, and I was a stubborn arse for a long time,” his dad admitted. “I let my insecurities put you and Mum in a very bad position. This is why I talk about pressure. You have been raised around extraordinary women. Women who have sparks of talent they can’t deny.”
His mother was a doctor. She was driven and practically glowed with purpose.
His sister had started dancing at the age of five. Most kids outgrew it, but not Elodie. She was attending a prestigious university and expected to join a company when she graduated.
He’d had his shot at the career he’d thought he’d been destined for, and it hadn’t worked out. “I’m very proud of them both.”
“But you wish you had that spark,” his father prompted.
Nate shook his head. “No, I wish I knew where I belong. Don’t think I’m not grateful, Dad. I love my family, but I don’t belong here anymore. At least when I was working with the team I felt some sense of purpose.”
He’d been called in to help with an op Tag’s daughters and their team had been running in Sydney. Naturally it had all gone to hell, but it had been the one thing in months that made him feel like he mattered.
“You won’t be working with the Agency,” his father pointed out. “You’re going into the bodyguard unit. It’s not the same. Do you want to be an investigator? Because Damon probably has more room for you to move around.”
“I’ve lived in London. I want something new. I want to try this. Like I said, I don’t mean to hurt you or Mum.”
“We’ll be fine. I simply want to make sure you’re not running away for the wrong reasons.”
“I don’t think I’m running away at all. I’ve been drifting. I don’t want to work the station the rest of my life,” Nate admitted.
His father’s arms crossed over his chest as he looked out across the lawn. “I don’t have a problem with you wanting out. Your sister wants another life, too. We came back to help your grandmother. She’s gone now, and we’ll probably sell the place. Your mum has a hankering to travel again.”
His mother’s version of travel would be to go to the world’s forgotten places and try to make them better. His father would be right beside her. “She wants to open another clinic?”
He’d been born in a clinic his mother had run outside of Sierra Leone.
“Her kids are grown and I think she wants to do more good in the world. And I’ll be honest, I’m looking forward to having time with her, but I worry what happens if we’re out wandering the world and you need us. Am I wrong to not keep a place for you to come home to?”
Damn, but he loved this man. “You and Mum and Elodie are my home. Not some space. I know if I ever need you, you’ll be there. I’m trying to be brave, Dad. It would be easy to stay here and work this station and marry someone from town, but it’s not what’s in my heart.”