Total pages in book: 74
Estimated words: 71840 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 359(@200wpm)___ 287(@250wpm)___ 239(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 71840 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 359(@200wpm)___ 287(@250wpm)___ 239(@300wpm)
Tell him the truth.
I couldn’t. I didn’t know what it would do to him.
Something worse than you leaving him for dead?
I left him as well off as I could.
He doesn’t see it that way.
I’d done what I had to do. I knew that was objectively true, but I also hated myself for shooting him and letting him think I was a traitor.
I wasn’t kidding about being forbidden to tell him, but I was lying to him and myself that I didn’t care about that. Telling him wasn’t going to compromise the mission. I’d already done that by running and not contacting the cartel leaders.
I couldn’t go back there. Even if I didn’t know they’d be suspicious of me, I didn’t have the stomach for it anymore. Seeing Carter had fucked me up even more than I’d expected. I couldn’t pretend to be the scum of the earth now. I was already afraid the months I’d been undercover had made me into the monster Carter believed me to be.
I wouldn’t go back, and I wasn’t going on another CIA assignment. I didn’t give a fuck what kind of contract I’d signed. I could deal with this head on and hope Carter’s powerful friends could get me out of this, or I could run.
You promised Carter you wouldn’t.
He already knows I’m a liar.
He doesn’t know what you are.
If I ran, I’d be hiding from the cartel and the CIA. That should scare the hell out of me. But staying, fighting for Carter, having him so close but knowing he’d likely never forgive me no matter how noble my gesture had been, scared me way more.
To win him back, I’d have to confess how I felt about him, that I’d started falling for him the moment we’d met. I’d tried to shut down all my emotions while I was with the cartel. Feeling dead inside was the only way to live with the horrible things I watched happen around me but couldn’t stop.
If I ran now, I could pretend none of this happened—Carter hadn’t fucked all the feeling back into me. I hadn’t cried in his arms. I hadn’t seen the questions in his eyes or the intensity that had always been there.
My stomach flip-flopped, and dizziness washed over me. I couldn’t do this. I couldn’t stay here. My hand was on the doorknob when my phone buzzed. The number wasn’t the one I’d used to contact my handler, but the text included the correct code word.
Why was he using a new phone? The hairs on the back of my neck stood up. Something was wrong. When I didn’t respond, he texted again.
Where are you?
I was captured, but I’m out now.
Captured by who? Montgomery?
Yes.
You need to watch your back.
No shit.
Something’s going down. Every search I do to try and uncover the parties involved gets blocked.
Blocked how?
Dead ends. Documents missing. Files corrupted. People who say they forgot when I know they never forget a word spoken to them.
Fuck, this goes deeper than we thought.
It does, and I can’t help you anymore.
What do you mean?
You’re being cut loose. Your mission failed, and the agency will pretend you’ve never worked for us. As far as the agency is concerned, you don’t exist.
What the fuck?
You knew this could happen.
You still have no idea where this started or who tried to set up C?
Look into his family. That’s the last thing I can tell you.
Carter had said they were assholes, but would they do this? Maybe they had an enemy. No. Somehow that just didn’t fit.
What makes you think they are connected?
Got to go. Good luck.
I hadn’t wanted to join the fucking CIA, but I needed their resources if I was going to figure out who’d come after Carter and whether he was still in danger.
Give me another way to contact you.
The text failed to go through. He’d probably already destroyed the phone.
Fuck. I needed a hacker way more qualified than me.
My next text went out to Leo.
12
CARTER
Ithought Miles would insist we go all the way back to the city, but instead we went to Ford and Jay’s house which only took a few minutes. None of us said anything on the ride there. When we’d been joined by Jay and we were all settled in his sunroom with drinks in our hands, Miles started to speak, but Worth cut him off. “Before we make any plans.”
“Before I make plans,” Miles said.
Ford glared at him. “This affects all of us.”
“That’s why I need to—”
“No.” The sharpness of Worth’s voice surprised all of us. He focused on me and continued. “First, we need to know exactly what is going on between you and Matteo. You told us you’d hooked up a few times, but I saw the way you were looking at each other. I may be the least romantic one of us all—” Miles snorted which earned him a glare. “But even I know there was a hell of a lot more going on. You were doing that eye talking shit that couples do.”