Total pages in book: 92
Estimated words: 83401 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 417(@200wpm)___ 334(@250wpm)___ 278(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 83401 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 417(@200wpm)___ 334(@250wpm)___ 278(@300wpm)
Or maybe she was out there, frail and old already, having lived a full, happy life, in love with somebody else, children and grandchildren surrounding her.
And although it ate me up to think of my female with anyone else, it was a reality, especially if she was human.
Wherever she was, whoever she was, she held my heart and soul in her hands and didn’t even realize it.
I closed the door to the small, minimalistic cabin that I’d called home for over two centuries. Nestled deep in the Highlands, still within Lycan territory, close enough that if I had to get to Banner or the royal family, I could shift and be there to protect and defend. But I kept far enough away that I could still wallow in my own loneliness, like a scab that was being picked at constantly so it would never heal.
My life could be much worse, I thought. I could have had a shit hand dealt like my fellow brother in arms, Odhran. I could have found my mate only to have her taken from me like he had. To think of seeing her, being close enough to touch her, yet have her viciously ripped from me before I could make her mine would be the cruelest punishment, a fate worse than death.
Yeah, I could have had it much worse.
I stood there with the front door to my back, the cabin spread out in front of me, and once again was struck by how bare and empty it was. It had amenities to keep me as comfortable as someone could be. I turned around and left, right back out from where I’d come, heading around the side of the house, taking my clothes off as I went and letting them drop where they fell.
I didn’t want to be locked up between those four walls. I didn't want to stare at the fireplace and watch the flames eat away at the logs as I finished a bottle of whisky. And that was becoming my typical night, thinking of all the things I had to do, this burning feeling in my gut that said I needed to search, to find her.
I stood naked by the tree line, closed my eyes, and tipped my head back, inhaling the crisp fall air. It was colder this time of year, this iciness that clung to your skin, touching your flesh like frigid fingers. It felt good on my overheated body, wicking away the sweat of the day but doing nothing to get rid of the restless energy inside me.
And although I knew a run in my Lycan form wouldn’t help much either, it was better than the alternative.
I let the shift come over me, breaking bones and tearing skin, realigning everything until I dropped onto four paws, shaking out fur that covered my heavy form. My animal was huge and powerful, as large as a fucking Clydesdale, big enough to take down anything that stood in my way.
In my wolf body I smelled things more powerfully and heard everything. My vision was stark and precise, crystal clear as I took in the sound of bugs in the distance, the scent of another wolf running through the woods. I took off, letting my front and hind legs eat up the distance, my paws sinking into the soft earth.
I ran faster, jumping over fallen logs, darting around low-hanging branches. I could see the brightness of the green moss covering the rocks along the creek. I could smell the earth’s aroma surrounding me. The Highlands were filled with life, and it brought energy to my Lycan, rooted him in his heritage and culture, made him one with Mother Nature.
We were a species of the earth, gaining strength from the moon, power from our surroundings. And so I took solace as I had for the last two and half centuries and ran free. This feeling only came second to what I knew I’d feel when I found my mate and experienced that Linked Connection.
Things could be worse, I thought, yet turning over those words in my head like a mantra did nothing to ease the ache in my soul.
I let myself run for so long that time blurred together. My bones ached; my muscles protested. But I didn’t care. I’d run until I couldn’t run anymore, until I limped and dragged my spent body back to my cabin before collapsing and sleeping. Because only then would my slumber be dreamless, my mind and body too exhausted to think, let alone feel.
I caught his scent before I saw him. I made a subtle shift in my trajectory so that I was heading toward the other Lycan. The closer I got, the more his aroma became clear, like a signature etched on his skin, a tattoo that would forever let an Otherworlder know who he was.