Total pages in book: 134
Estimated words: 131209 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 656(@200wpm)___ 525(@250wpm)___ 437(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 131209 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 656(@200wpm)___ 525(@250wpm)___ 437(@300wpm)
It was my first time I had kissed a woman.
It was the first time I pleasured myself in front of someone.
It was the first time I let someone in.
Into my heart and into my life.
I knew right then and there that I would never be the same. I knew I would be one of her favorites.
And all it took me was to find another one of my father’s indiscretions…
To feel like I was finally home.
CHAPTER ELEVEN
<>D<>
“Honey, I need you to go into your bedroom. You need to go into your bedroom and lock the door, okay? You don’t come out until I tell you to. Do you understand?”
“Why, Momma? I want to finish watching the movie and Dad just got home.”
We heard his car pull into the garage and her face immediately panicked.
“You just need to listen to me, it’s late. You need to go,” she ordered, patting my butt.
I looked over at the time and it read 1:00 AM. The garage door slammed open, knocking some pictures off the wall and making my mom and I jump.
“Where the fuck… are… my kids?” Dad slurred, walking funny into the living room.
“Hey, honey, I was just about to get Devon into bed.” She grabbed my hand and placed me behind her. She was doing that a lot more often. I peeked over on the side but still kept my body safely placed behind her legs.
“What the fuck is he doing up this late?”
“He wanted to finish watching the movie.”
“You’re a horrible fucking mother letting him stay up this late. I can’t trust you with anything, you stupid bitch!” he yelled, stumbling and placing his gun on the table.
I looked right at it with wide eyes. He wasn’t supposed to do that; Mom said he needed to keep his gun in a higher place, away from my sisters so we couldn’t reach it. But I promised her that I would never touch it.
“You like that, son?” he asked, catching me staring at it. “Maybe you will turn out to be something. Come here.”
I looked up at Mom and her face was sad and afraid. She always had the same face when Dad was around; she wasn’t the same mom with him in the house.
“I. Said. Come. Here.”
“Honey, he needs to go to sleep. Let me make you some coffee,” she coaxed, gripping on to my shoulders.
“Did I say I needed coffee? No, I didn’t! Now if he doesn’t come to me, I’m going to go get him, and trust me, you don’t want that to happen.”
I didn’t like the sound of his voice, but I moved away from her before she could reply and stepped closer to him.
“That gun, son,” he said, moving his head toward it, “carries so much power. You have no idea how much control and power you have with that simple weapon. I want you to pick it up and point it at your mother. Do you understand?”
“Rick…” she murmured.
“SHUT THE FUCK UP! I’m sick of hearing your goddamn voice. I am having a man-to-man chat with my son and if you know what’s good for you, you will shut the fuck up.”
I shook my head no, but he cocked his head to the side with a vindictive look on his face. “Are you saying no to me?”
“Dad, I don’t want to,” I wallowed, trying to hold back the tears.
“Grab the fucking gun, Devon, NOW!” he yelled.
He was going to wake my sisters up, so I did as I was told and grabbed the gun by the handle. It was heavy and felt cold. I wanted to place it back down on the table, but he must have sensed my hesitation because he moved closer to me and wrapped my hand around the gun, the way it’s supposed to be held he said. I hated the feeling and wanted to scream and run, but I knew if I did, it would be worse for my mom. I didn’t want him to hurt her anymore; I was tired of seeing him hurt her. She never did anything to deserve it.
I learned that if I cried when I saw him hurt her, it only turned out to be worse for her. He had no mercy and he would laugh and only hit her harder. He said she deserved it and he would call her all sorts of names. Some I understood and others I didn’t. I could tell by the tone of his voice that they weren’t nice and that she hated it, but she never said anything. She always took it and I never understood why.
“Now...” he yelled, breaking me from my thoughts and kneeling down to my level, grabbing my shoulders. “Turn around and point it at your mom.”
I shook my head again. “Please, Daddy, I don’t want to… please,” I wept. I couldn’t control my tears any longer and they flowed loosely down my face. I could taste them in my mouth and it was hard for me to see.