Total pages in book: 102
Estimated words: 96178 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 481(@200wpm)___ 385(@250wpm)___ 321(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 96178 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 481(@200wpm)___ 385(@250wpm)___ 321(@300wpm)
“Ren,” he whispered. “Cool story. Let’s go.” But she wasn’t done.
“I don’t have much to my name.” Shaking him off, she pulled her belongings from her backpack—some clothes, some paints, a few brushes, a notebook, and a scarf—and bent to set them on the bar. “So I’m gonna send this empty bag around the room,” she said, “and maybe someone will put our wallets back in here. And since I’ve interrupted all your conversations, I’ll tell you a few jokes while you pass it around.”
Oh, good God.
Bending, Ren handed the bag to the man closest to Fitz, who laughed and passed it along without putting anything inside it. This was a nightmare.
“Why did the pig dump her boyfriend?” Ren asked, and got absolutely zero reaction whatsoever. Somewhere behind them, Fitz heard a gun cock. “Because he was a real boar. Get it? Boar? It’s a type of pig!” She laughed at her own joke.
“Sweden,” Fitz urged, feeling nauseated. “Let’s go.”
“Okay, here’s one: What do you call a sleeping bull?”
He was about to lift her bodily off the bar and carry her out to the parking lot when she pointed to the crowd. “Do we have a guess?”
A towering man in a Budweiser hat and with a nose that had probably been broken a dozen times guessed, “A bulldozer?”
“Yes!” Ren crowed, and a few people in the crowd actually laughed. “Okay,” she said, brushing some strands of hair out of her face, “let me try something a little harder. You’re too smart for me. What did the ocean say to the beach?” Around them, people murmured, trying to guess without calling anything out. “Nothing, silly,” she said, laughing. “It just waved.”
There was a collective groan throughout the room, but it was carried on laughter. In the back, someone let out a loud whistle. “Keep it going, kid!”
When Fitz looked back up at her, Ren was backlit from the bar lights, and for a breathless pulse, she looked like a figment from a dream he once had. “I asked my dog what two minus two is. Do you know what he said?” She planted her fists on her hips. “Absolutely nothing!”
More people cheered now, and a woman in the back yelled, “These are terrible! Do more!”
“Why can’t a nose be twelve inches long?” Ren said, and a chorus of bawdy catcalls rose from around the bar. “No, not that, you rascals! A nose can’t be twelve inches long because then it would be a foot!” She took a couple steps down the bar. “That car seems nice—”
And a voice to the side called out, “But the muffler is exhausted!”
The whole bar was laughing now, even the bartender.
“What did the Zero say to the Eight?” she asked, just as the bag made its way back to her feet. “Nice belt!” She glanced down at Fitz when he squeezed her calves. “Knock knock!”
The entire bar yelled, “Who’s there!”
“Tank.”
“TANK WHO?” the room shouted in unison.
“You’re welcome.” Ren did a little curtsy to their roaring applause, losing her balance and managing to fall directly into Fitz’s arms.
She stared up at him, wide green eyes shining. “Well, look at that. There’s something in my bag.”
“Bet there’s some great trash in there,” Fitz said, but as he put her down, he couldn’t help but let her go slowly, keeping her close even as her feet touched the floor. Hunger flashed warm inside his chest, and he pulled her a little closer, feeling her go soft against him. “That was really something.”
“Not bad, huh?” She lingered, arms draped around his neck.
“Correct. It was terrible.” He reached up, drawing a long strand of hair away from her flushed cheek, and, with his other hand against her delicate shoulder blade, Fitz could feel her wildly beating heart. What a surprising thing you are, he thought.
“You laughed,” she said, grinning up at him. He felt her fingertips toying with the hair at the nape of his neck. “I saw you.”
He stared down at her, soaking her in as it seemed every synapse in his brain rewired. She was such a paradox: delicate but unbreakable; modest but intrepid; innocent but electrifying. Fitz found his eyes dipping to her full, pink lips and back up to those assured, sparkling eyes. He’d wanted to touch many women in his life. But he’d never so badly wanted to deserve one before.
“Kiss her!” someone yelled, breaking the spell.
Startling, Ren stepped back and pushed loose strands of hair out of her eyes. “We should go.”
“Yeah,” Fitz said, bending to take one bite of his burger, “let’s get out of here while they still like us.”
While Ren ate as much of her burger as she could, the bartender gave Fitz what he desperately hoped was a smile. “On the house,” the man growled.
Then they moved through the crowd, being patted and hugged and fist-bumped until they reached the door where they burst outside, squinting at the brilliant daylight. Fitz let them into the car, where they collapsed, stunned.