Total pages in book: 148
Estimated words: 140412 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 702(@200wpm)___ 562(@250wpm)___ 468(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 140412 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 702(@200wpm)___ 562(@250wpm)___ 468(@300wpm)
Tara can’t look me in the eye now. “Not like at the festival. It’s a real whip, and it really, really hurts. I felt so bad for Josh because he kept saying ‘sorry’ after every lash.”
“No way.” I push myself up from the bed and bolt across the room, as if I can escape the ceremony by getting further from my sister’s description of it.
“Do you want me to keep talking, or have you heard enough?” Tara asks, genuine concern behind her words.
I don’t want to hear anymore, but not knowing will only make whatever I imagine after worse than it probably actually is. “Fine.”
She hesitates, but continues when I shoot her an icy glare. “After the whipping, he transforms and the two of you…mate.”
“While he’s a werewolf?” Maybe I’ve been around humans too long, but that sounds so disgusting to me. Plus, everyone else in there is doing it, too? “Do the acolytes like, watch or something? This is so gross!”
“Nobody watches. That I know of,” she quickly revises. “But trust me, it’s not as mortifying as it sounds. You really get swept up in the ceremony. You feel like you’re a part of something. And when it starts… you want to be a part of it.”
“They probably didn’t anoint you. They just smeared drugs into your skin or something,” I mutter as I pace in front of my window.
“Oh, stop. You wanted to know what it was like, and I told you,” she reminds me. “But yeah, you do feel drugged, I guess.”
“Great.” I throw my hands up. “And then what? He carries you over the threshold of your new house and you get to the live the housewife dream? Stay home, raise the kids, do whatever the head of the household tells you because that’s the way it’s always done? Yeah, I’m going to pass on becoming a zombie in an apron.”
“Thanks for letting me know what you think of my life.” Tara gets up and goes to the door, and I immediately feel bad for offending her. Before I can say anything, she pauses to say, “You were a lot nicer before you left, you know that, right?”
My mouth falls open. “When I unquestioningly accepted everything we were told by the pack?”
“Oh, please!” She makes a wordless shout of exasperation. “If you ever, even once in your life, unquestioningly accepted everything we were told by the pack, you wouldn’t have gone looking for the stupid Right of Accord in the first place!”
“I didn’t go looking for it! I didn’t know it existed!”
“That’s bullshit! You were looking for a loophole and you found one. And now, you don’t like that you can’t have it both ways. You’re furious that you can’t just pick and choose what parts of pack law you want to follow.” Her sneer of disgust cuts me deep. “If you don’t want to be a part of the pack, fine. But don’t pretend like you’re better than the rest of us. Don’t pass judgment on us because we know who we are.”
She storms out and I let her go, because in my anger at the situation I’ll say something she doesn’t deserve. But once she’s gone, there’s nothing stopping me from imagining all those things she’s told me, all those horrible things Ashton is going to do to me. The idea of sleeping with him was bad enough, but letting him whip me and fuck me while I’m tied up in some dank cell is beyond twisted.
But it might not be Ashton.
Maybe it shouldn’t change my feeling on the ceremony, overall, but if I replace Ashton with Nathan in my mind, it does. No drugging required.
I was unfair to my sister. It’s not like staying at home and being a mother is a bad thing. I just hate that it’s not a choice, but an expectation. Tara didn’t make our world, she’s just a part of it the way all of us are.
I can’t do this. I can’t be that person for Ashton.
I grab my keys and shoes and run downstairs and out a service door before anyone can see me. There’s only one person who can strike down this mating pact, and I need an answer from him tonight.
CHAPTER 15
I have no idea what I’m doing as I race to Aconitum Hall. I don’t know if Nathan will be there or if I can even see him. But he’s the king; it’s not like I have his private cell phone number or anything.
Then maybe you shouldn’t be driving over to his house unannounced. My rational mind has a point, but my panic brain overrides it. I’m not rushing over to his house to declare my love or beg him to be my boyfriend. He’s the pack leader, I’m his subject, and I need help.