Total pages in book: 76
Estimated words: 73117 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 366(@200wpm)___ 292(@250wpm)___ 244(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 73117 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 366(@200wpm)___ 292(@250wpm)___ 244(@300wpm)
I stared at the doors, letting my head drop into my hands. He was right. He’d greeted me with a terrific smile before I’d barked at him. The truth was, I was a great communicator until it came to Adam Mackay. It felt like my pride was slipping from between my fingers whenever we were together. Like I needed to make sure he knew I wasn’t in love with him. Only I was. The entire time. Maybe I still could be… What a mess.
I heard his back sliding down one of the doors as he sat on the other side. I did the same, pressing my back against the door he leaned on. I could practically feel the heat of his body radiating through the wood. The back of his head thudded against the oak in a steady rhythm. I knew his eyes were closed, like mine.
“Fuck,” he hissed, laughing humorlessly. “I did this to pacify your brother, but one look at you, and I’m back to square one. I don’t suppose you’d be open to the idea of staying at the Chateau Marmont until you figure your living situation out? My treat.”
“Um.” I fought a slow-spreading grin, something warm and fuzzy nestling behind my ribcage. He cared. He felt. He liked me back, even after all those years. “I’ve never been to the Chateau.”
“It’s great. Designed like a brothel, but great.”
“Been to a lot of brothels, Mackay?” I quirked an eyebrow.
“Absolutely not.” There was a comedic pause. “Just a couple.”
I laughed. “What about Betsy?”
“My assistant can take care of her.”
“What about us?”
“There is no us. You made it pretty clear a decade ago. And again this week.”
Adam Mackay liked me.
No, more than that, he liked me enough to make a stupid mistake when he was a teenager in a bid to make me jealous. His plan had worked. Too well, in fact.
Now that I knew his motives, it changed everything.
Was it awful that it (mostly) made me forget all about Chris? It wasn’t that I didn’t care for my ex. I did. And I knew I would never, in a million years, cheat on him while we were together. But Chris didn’t truly love me, and if I was being honest with myself, I didn’t truly love him, either. The only reason we chose each other was because we were the safe option for one another. I knew I was never capable of getting hurt by Chris as I had with Adam. Case in point—I’d caught Chris cheating, and it still didn’t rip my heart out of my chest the way seeing Adam with Maya had.
But Adam wasn’t with Maya, a small voice inside me chirped cheerfully. He just pretended to be. He wanted to be with you.
“I’m sorry,” I said from the other side of the door. “Okay? There, you have it. A real apology. With the S word and everything. I’m sorry for ten years ago, and for six days ago. I’m sorry I couldn’t articulate my feelings well. I’m sorry I didn’t have the guts to go for it with you. I’m sorry I let you go,” I finished softly.
“I’m sorry for being a dumbass at eighteen.” Adam sighed in response. I smiled to myself. I didn’t know why, but I was pretty sure he was smiling on the other side of that door, too. “That I went about it the wrong way. That I waited for you to take the first step just because I thought it’d make my life ten times easier.”
“Were you really that scared of Val?” I chuckled.
“He chased me with a billiard stick when I asked him, hypothetically, how he would react if I asked you out six months prior to Maya-gate,” Adam deadpanned. I burst out laughing, something warm spreading in my chest. He’d wanted to go for it. He’d wanted to ask me out.
“Guess you got the answer to your question.”
“And then some.”
“I was prepared to go against Val about it…kind of,” I admitted. “I really liked you. Trouble was, I thought you liked everyone else.”
“I never liked anyone else.” His voice was a low growl. A promise. “Not like this. Maybe not at all. So…” His voice took a mischievous edge. “You wanted me, huh?”
“That’s the understatement of the century. My phone was a shrine full of screenshots of your pictures.”
He laughed. “Same. I even looked for you on social media over the years. Your presence is surprisingly underwhelming.”
“Yes.” I smiled. “I’m private, like that.”
“Me too,” he deadpanned. He was one of the most famous people in the world. Another giggle burst out of me. And just like that, we acted like the past decade hadn’t happened. Like the night in my room hadn’t, either. It was just us. Making each other laugh and roll our eyes.
I had to pull away. To give both of us time to digest everything. I needed a minute to savor this thing. To take a breath before things snowballed into a territory I’d never been in.