Total pages in book: 46
Estimated words: 42809 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 214(@200wpm)___ 171(@250wpm)___ 143(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 42809 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 214(@200wpm)___ 171(@250wpm)___ 143(@300wpm)
I suffered in silence for too long because I didn’t believe there was a way out. Not until the opportunity came while I was in that hospital bed. When the nurse walked in and told me she could release me early, I realized this was my chance. The nurse knew about my abuse—everyone in that hospital knew the moment I came in. There were old scars, fading bruises, and there were fractures from past nights of Rogan being angry. I couldn’t hide the damage any longer.
“I didn’t regret it then, and I don’t now.” Sully’s voice drags me back to the present.
“I didn’t think you would, and you shouldn’t,” I tell him earnestly. “Your mother needed you and you were there for her. You should be proud that you could save her from a worse fate.”
Sully looks at me once more and takes my hand. “What I need ye ta know is I enjoyed killing him. I reveled in it, and I know I shouldn’t have. What kinda man does that make me?”
“It makes you someone who’d do anything to protect those you love,” I say. It’s what I believe, and nothing he tells me will change my mind. “You may not see it that way just yet, but it’s true.”
He shakes his head, and I know he’s going to try to argue with me. But I’m not listening to him. I don’t want to, because I know he’s a good person. There’s no denying it. Ever.
“Listen to me,” I say as I scoot closer to him. “You’re a man who’ll do anything in your power to keep innocent people safe. It doesn’t matter if you know them or not. Even when we met at the rehab centre, I could see you for who you truly are. I’ve always been afraid around men. It’s just part of who I am. But with you…”
Sully watches me as I try to find the words to describe what I’m thinking. I’m not sure anymore. I just need him to know I’m here, and I’m not leaving him.
Finally, I continue, “…With you, I feel safe. I know you won’t hurt me, and I know that no matter what happens between us, I’ll always care about you.”
In some ways, I’m trying to tell him I’ve fucked up, and I don’t want him to hate me. But, instead of telling him the truth, I lean in and press my lips to his.
My chest tightens when he pulls me close and wraps his arms around me, holding me against him. Sully’s body is beautiful. Every dip and peak of his chest, torso, and arms are like granite.
“Thank ye fer listenin’ ta me,” Sully murmurs against my lips.
I know what’s coming next, and I want to delay it for as long as I possibly can. But the man before me, the one holding onto me, is far too intelligent to fall for my games. And I realize it’s time for me to give him a bit more insight into my past.
“Ye know what I want. Don’t ye?” he asks.
I nod and blink back the tears that are fighting to escape. They’ll fall. I know they will, and the moment I start crying, I don’t know if I’m ever going to be able to stop. The fear of scaring Sully away runs rife through my veins.
“Hey,” he says as he cups my face in his powerful hands. “I’m not goin’ anywhere. Ye will tell me what ye can, and we’ll work through it together.”
Perhaps it’s the fact I’m accepting him for who he is that makes him believe I’m a good person. I used to be, but then I broke, and I lost all the goodness inside me.
And now, I’m lying to a man I’m falling hard for.
EIGHT
CLOVER
It’s time for me to finally tell him everything. Well, everything about my past with Rogan, which I’ve tried so hard to hide from. But there’s no longer a reason to keep it secret. Sully has an inkling of what I’ve been through, and now he’s going to hear the rest of the story.
It’s difficult for me to think about. Sully doesn’t move. I’m not even sure he’s breathing when I look up at him. There’s affection in his dark eyes, and I offer a small, shy smile before I take a deep breath and start to speak.
“When I was eighteen, I thought I knew everything.” I can’t stop the small smile on my lips. There were many times my dad’s best friend, Darius, told me to be careful. “Darius wanted me to go to art school, and I did for a while. He took over the club after Dad died, and I allowed him to be there for me. As a surrogate father.”
“I remember meetin’ him,” Sully says then. “He was ye da’s right-hand man fer years. I didn’t spend too long with him, but I recall yer da spoke highly of him.”