Total pages in book: 86
Estimated words: 83602 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 418(@200wpm)___ 334(@250wpm)___ 279(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 83602 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 418(@200wpm)___ 334(@250wpm)___ 279(@300wpm)
A half-hour passed. It felt like déjà vu as the red digital numbers of the alarm clock taunted me.
My text alert sounded at 2 A.M.
If I knock on your door tonight, don’t let me in.
CHAPTER 17
He was trying to do the right thing, and I respected the hell out of him for it. As powerful as temptation could be, I meant it when I told him I would never want him to cheat on her. At the same time, if I hadn’t gone to my room, I’m not sure that we could have avoided something happening. Tonight proved that whatever connection existed in the past between us was very much still alive and powerful. That was why it was best that we spent the rest of the night apart.
I was tossing and turning, still conflicted about leaving him alone. Even though what happened in the elevator had tainted the rest of the night, I needed to remind myself how this day started; he was still mourning his father. He really shouldn’t have been by himself tonight. Not to mention, we were wasting precious time because once he returned to California, I’d probably never see or hear from him again.
He was going to marry her.
Rustling in my sheets, I couldn’t take the insomnia anymore. The fact that the room was freezing didn’t help. I got up to shut off the air conditioner and grabbed my phone before returning to the bed.
Are you awake?
Elec: I was just about to order this amazing juicer. If I order right now, they’ll even throw in a bonus mini chopper all for just 19.99.
Greta: Can we talk? On the phone?
Not even three seconds went by before my phone rang.
“Hi.”
He whispered, “Hi.”
“I’m sorry,” we both said in unison.
“Jinx,” he said.
“You go first,” I said.
“I’m sorry for what I said to you in the elevator. I lost control.”
“You were being honest.”
“That doesn’t make it right. I’m sorry for the way it came out. You bring out the worst in me.”
“I’m touched.”
“Fuck. That came out wrong.”
I laughed. “I think I know what you’re trying to say.”
“Thank God you could always read between the lines with me.”
“How about we not rehash anything that was said in that elevator. I just want to talk.”
I could hear him moving around in the bed. He was probably gearing up for whatever conversation we were about to have.
He let out a deep breath into the phone. “Okay. What do you want to talk about?”
“I have some questions. I don’t know if this is my last opportunity to ask them.”
“Alright.”
“Did you stop writing?”
“No. I didn’t.”
“How come you didn’t tell Chelsea that you write?”
“Because from the time that I met her, I’ve only been working on one project, and it’s not something I really feel like I can share with her.”
“What is it?”
“It’s autobiographical.”
“You’ve been writing your life story?”
“Yeah.” He sighed. “Yeah, I have.”
“Does anyone know?”
“No. Just you.”
“Is it therapeutic?”
“Sometimes. Other times, it’s hard to relive certain things that happened, but it just felt like I needed to do it.”
“If she doesn’t know about it, when do you write?”
“Late at night when she’s asleep.”
“Are you gonna tell her?”
“I don’t know. There are things in there that would upset her.”
“Like what do you—”
“My turn to ask a question,” he interrupted.
“Okay.”
“What happened with the guy you were engaged to?”
“How did you know I was engaged anyway?”
“Answer me first.”
“His name was Tim. We lived together for a little while in New York. He was a good person, and I wanted to love him, but I didn’t. The fact that I wouldn’t consider moving to Europe for him when his job transferred him there proved that. Really, there’s not much more to it than that. Now, will you tell me how you knew?”
“Randy told me.”
“I thought you were estranged.”
“We still spoke from time to time. I asked him about you once, and he gave me the news. I assumed that meant you were happy.”
“I wasn’t.”
“I’m sorry to hear that.”
“Did you have any other girlfriends besides Chelsea?”
“Chelsea’s my first serious relationship. I screwed around a lot before that.”
“I see.”
“I didn’t mean…you. You weren’t part of the screwing around. What happened with us was different.”
“I know what you meant.” After a block of silence, I said, “I want you to be happy, Elec. If she makes you happy, I’m happy for you. You told me she was the best thing that ever happened to you. That’s great.”
“I didn’t say that,” he said curtly.
“Yes, you did.”
“I said she was one of the best things. So were you. Just in another time.”
Another time—a time that’s passed.
You get the picture now, Greta?
“Thank you,” I said.
“Don’t thank me. I took your fucking virginity and left. I don’t deserve your thanks.”
“You did what you felt you had to do.”
“It was still wrong. It was selfish.”
“I still wouldn’t change anything about that night if that makes you feel better.”